Lucas Meadows

“It isn`t premarital sex if you have no intention of getting married.”
― Drew Carey

“Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so?
There's a support group for that. It's called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar.”
― Drew Carey

“My mind was a mess back then as I drove across the country. I was driving to clear my head, and all I could do was obsess on my uncertain future. It's like you're at a crap game, and on your biggest roll, the dice go in slow motion. For months, you watch them spin and roll and bounce around, waiting for them to land so you know if you're a
winner or a loser. Total limbo.”
― Drew Carey, Dirty Jokes and Beer: Stories of the Unrefined

“Eating crappy food isn't a reward -- it's a punishment.”
― Drew Carey