Maggie

“If you are truly serious about preparing your child for the future, don’t teach him to subtract—teach him to deduct.”
― Fran Lebowitz, The Fran Lebowitz Reader

“Flight 477 to Minneapolis will depart oh, let’s say, eightish. Flight 477 to Minneapolis will depart around eight, eight-thirty. Flight 477 to Minneapolis will depart while it’s still dark. Flight 477 to Minneapolis will depart before the paperback is out.”
― Fran Lebowitz, The Fran Lebowitz Reader

“War is, undoubtedly, hell, but there is no earthly reason why it has to start so early in the morning.”
― Fran Lebowitz, The Fran Lebowitz Reader

“Try to derive some comfort from the knowledge that if your guidance counselor were working up to his potential, he wouldn’t still be in high school.”
― Fran Lebowitz, The Fran Lebowitz Reader