Maggie

“If you are truly serious about preparing your child for the future, don’t teach him to subtract—teach him to deduct.”
― Fran Lebowitz, The Fran Lebowitz Reader

“Try to derive some comfort from the knowledge that if your guidance counselor were working up to his potential, he wouldn’t still be in high school.”
― Fran Lebowitz, The Fran Lebowitz Reader

“Flight 477 to Minneapolis will depart oh, let’s say, eightish. Flight 477 to Minneapolis will depart around eight, eight-thirty. Flight 477 to Minneapolis will depart while it’s still dark. Flight 477 to Minneapolis will depart before the paperback is out.”
― Fran Lebowitz, The Fran Lebowitz Reader

“Think before you speak. Read before you think.
This will give you something to think about that you didn’t make up yourself — a wise move at any age, but most especially at seventeen, when you are in the greatest danger of coming to annoying conclusions.”
― Fran Lebowitz, Social Studies