Coco Galicia

“It's been my experience that people who make proclamations about themselves are usually the opposite of what they claim to be.”
― Chelsea Handler, Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea

“Have you ever experienced a pain so sharp in your heart that it's all you can do to take a breath? It's a pain you wouldn't wish on your worst enemy; you wouldn't want to pass it on to anyone else for fear he or she might not be able to bear it. It's the pain of being betrayed by a person with whom you've fallen in love. It's not as serious as death, but it feels a whole lot like it, and as I've come to learn, pain is pain any way you slice it.”
― Chelsea Handler, My Horizontal Life: A Collection of One-Night Stands

“In politics, my dear fellow, you know, as well as I do, there are no men, but ideas — no feelings, but interests; in politics we do not kill a man, we only remove an obstacle, that is all.”
― Alexandre Dumas, The Count of Monte Cristo

“HE BROKE HIS NOSE GIVING A FAKE BLOWJOB. Holy shit. I love that story with every part of me.”
― Sarah Silverman, The Bedwetter: Stories of Courage, Redemption, and Pee