Michael Stockinger

“The only candidate I'd allow to play my music would be Bigfoot, and unless we're talking about foraging for squirrels, he's notoriously apolitical.”
― Greg Gutfeld, Not Cool: The Hipster Elite and Their War on You

“Autumn is a fleeting season, melancholy by nature. Its ghostly beauty cultivates a fertile atmosphere for memories that wrote their history on a tablet of fallen leaves - I recall them with the greatest clarity... Whatever else autumn may be, it is the prophet of winter. Winter lasts forever.”
― Brian P. Easton, Autobiography of a Werewolf Hunter

“I can't die until the government finds a safe place to bury my liver”
― Phil Harris

“That was pretty easy, and I wrote it while delousing my pet tapir.”
― Greg Gutfeld, The Joy of Hate: How to Triumph over Whiners in the Age of Phony Outrage