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The Correspondent
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by Virginia Evans (Goodreads Author)
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  (page 196 of 304)
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Steven Wright
“Everywhere is walking distance if you have the time.”
Steven Wright

Woody Allen
“I was nauseous and tingly all over. I was either in love or I had smallpox.”
Woody Allen

Groucho Marx
“From the moment I picked up your book until I put it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.”
Groucho Marx

Jerry Seinfeld
“The Swiss have an interesting army. Five hundred years without a war. Pretty impressive. Also pretty lucky for them. Ever seen that little Swiss Army knife they have to fight with? Not much of a weapon there. Corkscrews. Bottle openers. ‘Come on, buddy, let’s go. You get past me, the guy in the back of me, he’s got a spoon. Back off, I’ve got the toe clippers right here.”
Jerry Seinfeld

William Goldman
“Life is pain, highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something.”
William Goldman, Four Screenplays with Essays: Marathon Man - Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid - The Princess Bride - Misery

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