Wilson

“But I do like Scotland. I like the miserable weather. I like the miserable people, the fatalism, the negativity, the violence that's always just below the surface. And I like the way you deal with religion. One century you're up to your lugs in it, the next you're trading the whole apparatus in for Sunday superstores. Praise the Lord and thrash the bairns. Ask and ye shall have the door shut in your face. Blessed are they that shop on the Sabbath, for they shall get the best bargains. Oh yes, this is a very fine country.”
― James Robertson

“Hell, it is well known, has no fury like a woman who wants her tea and can't get it.”
― P.G. Wodehouse, Very Good, Jeeves!

“I'm tired of this back-slappin' "isn't humanity neat" bullshit. We're a virus with shoes.”
― Bill Hicks

“Watch out he's winding the watch of his wit, by and by it will strike.”
― William Shakespeare, The Tempest