Amy

“A friend is someone who knows all about you and still loves you.”
― Elbert Hubbard

“The cow is of the bovine ilk; one end is moo, the other milk.”
― Ogden Nash, Free Wheeling

“Yes, we praise women over 40 for a multitude of reasons. Unfortunately, it's not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed, hot woman over 40, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year old waitress. Ladies, I apologize. For all those men who say, "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?", here's an update for you. Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage. Why? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage!”
― Frank Kaiser

“Candy is dandy, but liquor is quicker.”
― Ogden Nash, Hard Lines