Canyon

“That's why ears have cartilage, to keep them from flapping.”
― Bill Cosby

“Peanut: Come here puppet boy... make your daddy talk!”
― Jeff Dunham

“Hey, lay off the dairy. And uh, no more happiness.”
― Brian Regan

“We needed a refrigerator for our new place and I've never bought a refrigerator my whole life. I went into the appliance store, there's like 900 of 'em lined up, there's a salesman there. What's this guy supposed to say about refrigerators? "Well you got this refrigerator here, This keeps all your food cold for 600...You've got this refrigerator, This keeps all your food cold for 800...Check this out, 1400, keeps all your food cold.”
― Brian Regan