Sign in with Facebook
463 books
—
330 voters
Editing Services by Cynthia Shepp
https://cynthiashepp.com
https://www.goodreads.com/cynthiasheppedits
Besides, birds are notoriously hard to train, rainbows are almost impossible to count on, and having an orchestra follow you around every day would be cumbersome. The day-to-day of relationships rarely feature Celine Dion power ballads.
“I think he likes you.”
I watched Paci join the others, noticing that he was still glancing at me occasionally, and watching other guys who were looking over at Peter and me.
“Really?”
“Yeah. He keeps watching you. Once he heard Bodo wasn’t your boyfriend, he was all over that.”
I sighed. “Shit.”
“Yeah. Exactly. You’d better not go around advertising you’re single. There’s not a hell of a lot of available jawbreakers if you know what I mean.”
My mind raced with the implications. It was stupid of me not to have been thinking about all this stuff before. I guess I was so wrapped up in finding food to eat, a place to live, and companions who wouldn’t eat me, I hadn’t much considered the other human needs, other than on the most basic level. God, I hope there are no rapists in this group. The last thing I wanted to do was kill a guy in the swamp.”
― Warpaint
I watched Paci join the others, noticing that he was still glancing at me occasionally, and watching other guys who were looking over at Peter and me.
“Really?”
“Yeah. He keeps watching you. Once he heard Bodo wasn’t your boyfriend, he was all over that.”
I sighed. “Shit.”
“Yeah. Exactly. You’d better not go around advertising you’re single. There’s not a hell of a lot of available jawbreakers if you know what I mean.”
My mind raced with the implications. It was stupid of me not to have been thinking about all this stuff before. I guess I was so wrapped up in finding food to eat, a place to live, and companions who wouldn’t eat me, I hadn’t much considered the other human needs, other than on the most basic level. God, I hope there are no rapists in this group. The last thing I wanted to do was kill a guy in the swamp.”
― Warpaint
“Buster went bananas, running over to Paci and jumping up on his legs, begging for attention. Paci didn’t disappoint him, either. He bent down and baby-talked with Buster, like he was an old hand at it.
I smiled in amusement. Paci was no wimp. He was almost as big as Bodo and ripped to the max. He had zero body fat, so Peter and I were able to admire his every muscle, which I noticed Peter was doing with unabashed curiosity. I caught his attention and raised my eyebrows at him in a conspiratorial message of mutual admiration. He smiled in return, giving me a pitiful wink that made him look like he had something stuck in both eyes. It made me laugh.
Paci looked up at me. “Something strike you as funny?”
“Yeah. You baby-talking to a nude poodle.”
― Warpaint
I smiled in amusement. Paci was no wimp. He was almost as big as Bodo and ripped to the max. He had zero body fat, so Peter and I were able to admire his every muscle, which I noticed Peter was doing with unabashed curiosity. I caught his attention and raised my eyebrows at him in a conspiratorial message of mutual admiration. He smiled in return, giving me a pitiful wink that made him look like he had something stuck in both eyes. It made me laugh.
Paci looked up at me. “Something strike you as funny?”
“Yeah. You baby-talking to a nude poodle.”
― Warpaint
“Don’t worry. Your knight in shining armor will arrive someday. And when he does, I know he’ll not only be totally adorable, but he’ll be a good cuddler, too. I’ll bet Trip is a horrible cuddler.” I narrowed my eyes at the offender, ignoring his amazing body in favor of his imagined snuggling crimes.
“Yeah,” said Peter, gamely. “He probably just lays there and expects to be the cuddlee all the time and not the cuddler.”
“You are so right. Just look at him. I’ll bet you twenty bucks he’s a cover-stealer, too.”
“Not that twenty bucks means anything, since bills are only good for feeding fires right now, but yeah. I get it. I’ll bet you a can of beans he’s a cover-stealer.”
“A can of beans and a bag of chips,” I countered.
“Whoa. That’s serious. A bag of chips? Really?”
“What’s serious?” asked Kowi, coming up from behind and scaring both of us enough to make us jump.
“Uh … nothing?” I said, looking sheepish.”
― Warpaint
“Yeah,” said Peter, gamely. “He probably just lays there and expects to be the cuddlee all the time and not the cuddler.”
“You are so right. Just look at him. I’ll bet you twenty bucks he’s a cover-stealer, too.”
“Not that twenty bucks means anything, since bills are only good for feeding fires right now, but yeah. I get it. I’ll bet you a can of beans he’s a cover-stealer.”
“A can of beans and a bag of chips,” I countered.
“Whoa. That’s serious. A bag of chips? Really?”
“What’s serious?” asked Kowi, coming up from behind and scaring both of us enough to make us jump.
“Uh … nothing?” I said, looking sheepish.”
― Warpaint
“Chust a little farther. Keep your shoes on.”
Peter whispered to me. “Where does he get this stuff, anyway? Isn’t it pants? Aren’t we supposed to keep our pants on?”
“Maybe for Bodo shoes are more important. Maybe it’s a German thing.”
“You know, Chermans can hear very good. You are talking about me not very nice, I know it.”
“We were just talking about your creative colloquialisms,” said Peter.
I had no idea what that word meant, but it was fun to mess with Bodo, which is exactly what Peter was trying to do.
“Is dat like a fucktart?”
“What?” asked Peter, half choking.
“Fucktart. Dat’s a new word I learned today. Isn’t it a good one?”
“I told you before, Bodo,” I said, “it’s not fucktart. It’s fucktard. And you were right before. It’s not a nice word, so stop saying it.”
“I didn’t say fucktart. Dat was you. You are the lady saying all the fucktart words today. Or moron. She likes dat one, too. I think it means boy I luff.”
“Wow. You guys have one of the most messed up relationships I have ever seen,” said Peter, shaking his head. “Seriously. You fight to lighten the mood. You call each other names …”
“And we take showers togedder sometimes. Don’t forget dat.”
“Shut up, Bodo!”
“You do? Ew. That’s a public shower, you know.”
“We do not take showers together.”
“Yesss weeee doooo … ”
“One time! Okay? One time. And it’ll never happen again, I can promise you that.”
“I can promise you different!” said Bodo in a singsong voice.”
― Warpaint
Peter whispered to me. “Where does he get this stuff, anyway? Isn’t it pants? Aren’t we supposed to keep our pants on?”
“Maybe for Bodo shoes are more important. Maybe it’s a German thing.”
“You know, Chermans can hear very good. You are talking about me not very nice, I know it.”
“We were just talking about your creative colloquialisms,” said Peter.
I had no idea what that word meant, but it was fun to mess with Bodo, which is exactly what Peter was trying to do.
“Is dat like a fucktart?”
“What?” asked Peter, half choking.
“Fucktart. Dat’s a new word I learned today. Isn’t it a good one?”
“I told you before, Bodo,” I said, “it’s not fucktart. It’s fucktard. And you were right before. It’s not a nice word, so stop saying it.”
“I didn’t say fucktart. Dat was you. You are the lady saying all the fucktart words today. Or moron. She likes dat one, too. I think it means boy I luff.”
“Wow. You guys have one of the most messed up relationships I have ever seen,” said Peter, shaking his head. “Seriously. You fight to lighten the mood. You call each other names …”
“And we take showers togedder sometimes. Don’t forget dat.”
“Shut up, Bodo!”
“You do? Ew. That’s a public shower, you know.”
“We do not take showers together.”
“Yesss weeee doooo … ”
“One time! Okay? One time. And it’ll never happen again, I can promise you that.”
“I can promise you different!” said Bodo in a singsong voice.”
― Warpaint
“Maybe he used to like me, but I doubt he does anymore, now that I’ve insulted his bird fetish.”
Peter smiled. “He’s not going to stop liking you over one little argument. I don’t think he’s the type to just fall for someone and then hate them the next day. We don’t live in that kind of world anymore, anyway.”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, when there were thousands of possible mates to choose from, it was like being a huge candy store with a billion types of sugary things to choose from. You could sample one of everything and not worry about whether you’d like it much or whatever, because there was always another jar of candy nearby. But now, there’s no candy store. There’s a single jawbreaker that you found in the gutter. And there are no more jawbreaker factories. No more candy stores. No more refined sugar. That one jawbreaker you found could be the only one you’ll ever have again. You aren’t going to just eat it and say goodbye.”
His analogy wasn’t perfect but I saw where he was going with it. “So I’m like a jawbreaker. A dirty one you find in the gutter.”
“Yeah. And he likes that candy. It’s his favorite. So he doesn’t care that it has smelly feet.”
I scowled at him. “How do you know he likes jawbreakers so much?”
“I just know. I can tell a good match when I see one. He needs someone spunky and tough, someone different than other girls. That’s you.”
I smiled, liking how Peter had described me. “But what if he just decides to eat it real quick and then move on? I mean, there are other jawbreakers out there. They’re just more rare.”
“That’s not how he is. He’s methodical. A thinking person. He’s not rash. And he knows his odds of finding a jawbreaker of this flavor? Are pretty slim.”
“I’ve seen him do some stupid, rash things … like going after the candy at the Cracker Barrel.”
“That was all a very carefully-crafted way of making sure he had a good grip on his jawbreaker. He wants to keep the candy happy. Keep it sweet.”
I rolled my eyes. “Ugh. Your analogy is making me want to eye gouge you right now.”
― Kahayatle
Peter smiled. “He’s not going to stop liking you over one little argument. I don’t think he’s the type to just fall for someone and then hate them the next day. We don’t live in that kind of world anymore, anyway.”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, when there were thousands of possible mates to choose from, it was like being a huge candy store with a billion types of sugary things to choose from. You could sample one of everything and not worry about whether you’d like it much or whatever, because there was always another jar of candy nearby. But now, there’s no candy store. There’s a single jawbreaker that you found in the gutter. And there are no more jawbreaker factories. No more candy stores. No more refined sugar. That one jawbreaker you found could be the only one you’ll ever have again. You aren’t going to just eat it and say goodbye.”
His analogy wasn’t perfect but I saw where he was going with it. “So I’m like a jawbreaker. A dirty one you find in the gutter.”
“Yeah. And he likes that candy. It’s his favorite. So he doesn’t care that it has smelly feet.”
I scowled at him. “How do you know he likes jawbreakers so much?”
“I just know. I can tell a good match when I see one. He needs someone spunky and tough, someone different than other girls. That’s you.”
I smiled, liking how Peter had described me. “But what if he just decides to eat it real quick and then move on? I mean, there are other jawbreakers out there. They’re just more rare.”
“That’s not how he is. He’s methodical. A thinking person. He’s not rash. And he knows his odds of finding a jawbreaker of this flavor? Are pretty slim.”
“I’ve seen him do some stupid, rash things … like going after the candy at the Cracker Barrel.”
“That was all a very carefully-crafted way of making sure he had a good grip on his jawbreaker. He wants to keep the candy happy. Keep it sweet.”
I rolled my eyes. “Ugh. Your analogy is making me want to eye gouge you right now.”
― Kahayatle
Independent Author Services and Promotions
— 1130 members
— last activity Dec 10, 2025 06:05AM
This is a group to shamelessly promote yourself, your work, and your services. Authors, Readers, and anyone that has services to offer pertaining to p ...more
YA Fantasy Fans
— 29 members
— last activity May 28, 2013 05:37PM
Come share your love of Young Adult Fantasy books, TV shows, and movies with other like-minded readers. This group is hosted by Thaddeus Nowak.
YA Heartthrobs
— 43 members
— last activity Jul 19, 2014 08:03PM
Why do you love YA? Is it for all the swoon-worthy leads, totally worthy of being called "book boyfriend?" If you love your YA heartthrobs, join us fo ...more
Literary Dystopia
— 80 members
— last activity Aug 16, 2013 03:20PM
Literary Dystopia is a place for book enthusiasts who have a healthy appreciation of the classic dystopian genre and would like to learn more about ne ...more
Goodreads Authors/Readers
— 55669 members
— last activity 20 minutes ago
This group is dedicated to connecting readers with Goodreads authors. It is divided by genres, and includes folders for writing resources, book websit ...more
Editing Services’s 2025 Year in Books
Take a look at Editing Services’s Year in Books, including some fun facts about their reading.
525 books
|
117 friends
809 books
|
126 friends
201,356 books
|
810 friends
909 books
|
2,846 friends
3,244 books
|
188 friends
4,328 books
|
424 friends
168 books
|
990 friends
44 books
|
22 friends
More friends…
Favorite Genres
Polls voted on by Editing Services
Lists liked by Editing Services
