Ace

“You know," said Arthur, "it's at times like this, when I'm trapped in a Vogon airlock with a man from Betelgeuse, and about to die of asphyxiation in deep space that I really wish I'd listened to what my mother told me when I was young."
"Why, what did she tell you?"
"I don't know, I didn't listen.”
― Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy

“the supply of the milk of human kindness was short by several gallons”
― P.G. Wodehouse

“Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.”
― Douglas Adams

“-'What do ties matter, Jeeves, at a time like this?'
There is no time, sir, at which ties do not matter”
― P. G. Wodehouse