Jeff

“If you could pick one word in the English language to describe the universe, what would it be? Why?"

Here's my response:

Unfair.”
― Jordan Sonnenblick, Drums, Girls & Dangerous Pie

“A typical weeknight when he was home like this:

1. Sit down and try to do homework.
2. Get interrupted by Jeffrey: “Please play with me!”
3. Ignore brother, try to do homework.
4. Get interrupted by Jeffrey: “Come ON, Steven! I’m BORED!”
5. Beg Jeffrey for five minutes of peace.
6. Get begged for five minutes of play: “Steven, you never, ever play with me—ever!”
7. Move entire homework operations center to different room.
8. Repeat steps #1-7 as directed by small drugged maniac.”
― Jordan Sonnenblick, Drums, Girls & Dangerous Pie

“What do you call a planet where bad guys stroll through life with success draped around their shoulders like a King’s cloak, while random horrors are visited upon the innocent heads of children? I call it Earth.”
― Jordan Sonnenblick, Drums, Girls & Dangerous Pie

“Annette had kissed me.
Who would’a thunk it?”
― Jordan Sonnenblick, Drums, Girls & Dangerous Pie