Michael

“it's back to school time. or as home-schoolers call it, stay-where-you-are time.”
― Stephen Colbert

“Remember, Jesus would rather constantly shame gays than let orphans have a family.”
― Stephen Colbert

“If this is going to be a Christian nation that doesn't help the poor, either we have to pretend that Jesus was just as selfish as we are, or we've got to acknowledge that He commanded us to love the poor and serve the needy without condition and then admit that we just don't want to do it.”
― Stephen Colbert

“I cannot stand people who disagree with me on the issue of Roe v. Wade... which I believe is about the proper way to cross a lake.”
― Stephen Colbert