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Oscar Wilde
“Oh, well! The accounts I have received of Australia and the next world, are not particularly encouraging. This world is good enough for me, cousin Cecily.

CECILY.
Yes, but are you good enough for it?

ALGERNON.
I’m afraid I’m not that. That is why I want you to reform me. You might make that your mission, if you don’t mind, cousin Cecily.

CECILY.
I’m afraid I’ve no time, this afternoon.

ALGERNON.
Well, would you mind my reforming myself this afternoon?

CECILY.
It is rather Quixotic of you. But I think you should try.

ALGERNON.
I will. I feel better already.

CECILY.
You are looking a little worse.

ALGERNON.
That is because I am hungry.”
― Oscar Wilde, The Importance of Being Earnest
tags: humor

Oscar Wilde
“GWENDOLEN.
[...] Cecily, mamma, whose views on education are remarkably strict, has brought me up to be extremely short-sighted; it is part of her system; so do you mind my looking at you through my glasses?

CECILY.
Oh! not at all, Gwendolen. I am very fond of being looked at.”
― Oscar Wilde
tags: humor

Oscar Wilde
“In fact, now you mention the subject, I have been very bad in my own small way.

CECILY.
I don’t think you should be so proud of that, though I am sure it must have been very pleasant.”
― Oscar Wilde, The Importance of Being Earnest
tags: humor

Oscar Wilde
“CECILY.
[Sweetly.] Sugar?

GWENDOLEN.
[Superciliously.] No, thank you. Sugar is not fashionable any more. [Cecily looks angrily at her, takes up the tongs and puts four lumps of sugar into the cup.]”
― Oscar Wilde, The Importance of Being Earnest
tags: humor

Oscar Wilde
“I hope to-morrow will be a fine day, Lane.

LANE.
It never is, sir.”
― Oscar Wilde, The Importance of Being Earnest

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