Status Updates From No Biking in the House With...

None of us make it through parenting without hurting our kids. No individual is one-dimensional. We are more complex than that. This complexity is why it’s hard to balance the truth that my parents were great people with the fact that I often didn’t receive as much attention as my siblings.

There’s really only one disadvantage to working at home, but it’s a big one, and that is: sometimes your children are home.

Like many modern parents, I have invested a lot of energy in nonemergencies over the years; I tried to fix problems when it was a child’s right to try to set things straight by himself or herself. I dashed onto the field when I should have stood on the sidelines. I overempathized with transient disappointments when I should have invoked the big picture, the bright future.

Everyone wants a happy family, but some parents fear they don’t have the knack for it. We tilt anxiously above our children, examining them from every angle, consulting experts, and reading how-to books about increasing their popularity and enhancing their odds of getting into the expensive university of their choice. We’re afraid to steer by the light of what makes us laugh, of what makes us feel good.