Status Updates From Spearcrest Saints (Spearcre...

"My beautiful nemesis. My formidable adversary. My dearest rival." ✨✨

“I know you better than I know my own soul. I know every expression on your face like they are the lines of my favourite poems. Everything you think you keep hidden from the world, you can never quite hide from me. The beautiful things—your determination, your strength, your gentle soul—but the ugly things, too. Your ambition, your pain, your fear. Your desire. They’re naked to my eyes.”

“You don’t love me,” she hastens to say as if hoping to do some damage control—as if the idea of me loving her is damage that needs to be controlled.

“No,” I answer without shame. The balance of calm and emotion has tipped now. I’m as calm as a sea after a storm; her eyes are wide with panic. “I absolutely, undeniably, inexorably love you.”

omg😭😭 a man who’s shamelessly in love

“I love you atrociously.” He smiles, the hue of desire in his expression shifting, darkening into a sort of yearning melancholy. “I love you with every atom of my being, and I love every atom of yours. I love you desperately, like a starving man. I love you to distraction. And I think maybe you love me too, Theodora Dorokhova. You just aren’t quite ready to say it yet.”

my heart🥹🥹

“It’s not wasted at all,” he says instead, with that easy Blackwood confidence. “I could spend a fortune of flirtation on you, Theodora, and it would still not be a waste. I could lay treasures of compliments and tenderness at your feet like offerings to a cruel goddess, and you could ignore them all, and I would never once regret any of it.”

HES SO😭😭😭

“For the first time, we won’t have to see our names next to each other’s at the top of the boards.”

“What a shame,” he murmurs. “It was a bittersweet sight, but I’ve always thought our names look good next to each other’s.”

🥹🥹

“And what if you can never have her?” It’s a good question—one I’ve thought of often, alone at night in my bed, hard and tense with frustration and desire and despair.“

“Then life is going to hurt like a bitch.”

he’s gonna wait for her😭😭

“I’m not setting my sights on anyone. Theodora is the only one worthy of my desire. I couldn’t set my sights on anybody else if I tried. She and I are fated somehow. Anything else would be doomed by principle.”

🥹🥹💖

“Is having no girlfriend a social construct, too, then?”

“I don’t need a girlfriend,” I tell her in my most dignified tone. “I have a beautiful rival instead.”

AAW🥹🥹 he’s crushing so hard

he spent the entire night annotating peter pan because its her favorite book😭😭🥹

“My beautiful nemesis. My formidable adversary. My dearest rival.”

fuck i love them

“Who are you dressed as? Captain Hook? Thought you weren’t a fan of children’s literature.”

He shrugs. “So? It’s your favourite book, isn’t it? I thought it might amuse you.”

THEYRE TOO CUTE😭😭😭

she thinks that he achieves his grades so easily when shes working herself to the bone to be perfect while he had a literal panic attack because of it😭😭😭

he thinks that shes so untouchable and unaffected and manages to be so perfect without trying when hes stressing himself out to be good enough for her while shes not eating or sleeping😭😭😭

“I’ve still not deciphered the mystery of Theodora. I can’t die without knowing all her secrets, without having the shape of her heart and soul imprinted within me, without holding her close even once.”

he had a panic attack and he’s thinking about her😭😭😭😭😭

listening to aarzu on repeat while reading this

i’m imagining this man as jude bellingham and it’s doing things to my ovaries 🤭🤤🤤🤤🤤

“She laughs, and I kiss her laughing mouth, and my heart is full of that perfect, luminous sound—the sound of Theodora Dorokhova laughing.”

they are so fucking perfect 😭😭😭

“Zachary might not have bested you academically, Theodora—but in the field of self-sabotage, he emerged the uncontested victor. For his final assessment, he submitted a single blank piece of paper.”

i love them goodbye

“Miss Dorokhova submitted the opening chapter of a highly engaging, if rather… rambunctious story—a rousing and bawdy adventure on the high seas.”

“Not a… not a pirate romance?” I ask, torn between horror and amusement.

“Ah, I see you are a fan of The Buccaneer Captain’s Stolen Fiancée,” Mr Ambrose says in a completely serious tone.

IM CRYING

“I forgive you everything there is to forgive—I would forgive you anything at all. You could plunge a knife in my chest right now, and I would still forgive you.”She gives a warbling smile, and nascent tears glisten in her eyes. I’ve never seen Theodora cry; I should’ve known even her tears would be beautiful.”

“I don’t just look different, I feel different. Lighter, freer, but older too. For the first time, I feel wholly, completely myself. The real Theodora. And, as it turns out, the real Theodora is strong and resilient and smart and hard-working.”

“Even if Inessa is angry at me—furious at me—even if she hates me with every fibre of her being—I would still rather she hate me right to my face, hate me from up close, just so I could still be near her.”

inessa pattern up…..

“Rose has hijacked the conversation with a happy rant about going to fashion school in London and working on her first collection and launching her own couture line.”

“He’s the loveliest man I’ve ever met,” Rose sighs in the tone of a lovelorn princess leaning at her window. “And he makes me feel so loved and safe.”

“I notice, for the first time, how happy Rose seems. She’s dating a boy from Fernwell, apparently, and there’s a new ease to her.”

rosenoah i miss u

“My breath leaves my lungs, and my eyes sting. The truth drops from my mouth like the roses and diamonds dropping from the girl’s mouth in that French fairy tale.”

“I might have, even if I hated you then. I might have because there’s a part of me that’s always wanted you to save me.”