Status Updates From Easing the Teasing : Helpin...

Although most parents do not have a degree in education, all parents are teachers. We teach our children valuable life lessons every day.

Kids learn from what they live with on a day-to-day basis. A child who is physically or verbally aggressive at school is often imitating behaviors and words that he observes or experiences within his family.

While I don't advocate censorship, I do advocate careful monitoring by parents.

Summary of the ten strategies.

The first thing I tell kids who witness teasing is that the very least they can do is not show any support for the teaser.

We must strongly encourage a bystander or witness to intervene, show support, or ask for help. It is imperative that children take an active role when they witness or observe a classmate being teased.

Children whose parents convey empathy to them are more likely to convy empathy to others.

And in an age where families move around a lot and kids often opt for solitary activities like computer games, far too many kids are becoming deficient in these social skills.

A popular person vs. a friend

A child who doesn't deserve the admiration of others will not remain popular if everyone around him stops rewarding his negative behavior and attitudes. Thats what the strategies in ch. 6 are all about - children standing up for themselves and refusing to give creul and aggressive peers power.

If a child does not feel good about herself, she will forever be a victim of popularity.

The worse we feel about ourselves the more we let others define our worth.

A good friend is someone who makes you smile most of the time and cares about your feelings.

Encourage students who witness teasing to intervene either by telling the teaser to stop or by offering support to the teasee.

A plan for teaching the easing the teasing strategies in the classroom.

Classroom example of running a 30 minute teasing prevention class...

Classroom discussion provides the opportunity for students to know that there is strength in numbers. The students who are usually passive bystanders or witnesses may realize that they outnumber the teasers or bullies. Taking an active role takes the power away from the aggressive minority.

Tools to combat teasing in schools...

Children who are able to effectively deal with name-calling and ridicule are less likely to become victims of bullies.

There is strength in numbers. Support from classmates can often serve as powerful positive peer pressure that can help ease the teasing.

Reframing a tease, turning it around so that it is taken as a positive comment, is a powerful way to defuse a tease and deflate a teaser.

The 'I' Message - when we are gurt or angry we tend to accuse or blame the person that we view the cause of our distress: 'You make me so mad!' - Naturally this puts the other person on the defensive, making a mutually agreeable resolution pretty unlikely... Instead, try: 'I feel very angry when...' we invite the other person to empathize and consider our feelings without making any accuasations...