Status Updates From Exorcist by William Peter B...

Oh oh de crisis begint

I didn't realize that there were so many different uses of the word cunt

And no offense, but Regan is already not a great name, so shortening it to "Rags" is a bit much

there’s like a 10% chance i acc end up finishing this my knees r shaking already

'"Never mind. It doesn't matter." He unbuttoned the right sleeve of his
starched white shirt and rolled it up, exposing a matting of fine brown hairs
on a bulging, thickly muscled forearm.'

What Are We, Damien

'At the fringe of his awareness drifted a warning about women with
neurotic attractions to priest who desired, unconsciously and under the
guise of some other problem, to seduce the unattainable'

Don't you try and psychoanalyse me, Damien. I'm in no way neurotic, I just have a special interest, thank you.

'His voice was cradling, stripping her of burden, as his powerful hands
clasped gently together. They were large and yet sensitive: veined
Michelangelos.'

Mister Blatty, I'm about to scream real loud

wtf did I just read