Status Updates From Juilliard or Else

So Alex asked Abigails father for permission to marry her, but Abigail blames her stepmother. #logic

"'It's not an eating disorder. It was at first, and now it's just something my body does on its own. I hate it so bad; I feel like I can't control it anymore. It's taken control of me.'"

Are you fucking kidding me? That is what an eating disorder is. As someone who's had her own share of difficulties with eating disorders, this makes me want to punch something.

FYI, nothing interesting has happened yet unless you count the countless times Abigail swoons over Tucker or the times Abigail blames everything on her stepmother.

"My dad waved [Alex] over, but before he stood up, he turned and kissed my cheek. I was shell-shocked. He barely knew me and he kissed me?"

Oh, I can't be the only one seeing the irony, can I?

"'God, Gabs. You do something inside me that makes me want to be a better person. You're pure.'"

LESS THAN A WEEK YOU'VE KNOWN EACH OTHER. AM I THE ONLY ONE REALIZING THIS?

"Moreover, I was falling for him."

Oh. My. God. They don't even know each other. They met two days ago.

Baby-girl is Tucker's nickname for a girl (Abigail) he met, like, two days ago.

Please end this madness now.

"I couldn't stop hearing Rachel's moans in my head; I couldn't believe she was already sleeping with him. I thought stuff like that only happened in movies."

Fun fact: Many couples in Sweden start out as one-night stands, not much dating before. Just sayin'.

"Boys… they would never understand ballet, not even my dad."

Way to forget all the male ballet dancers. For a girl who does it herself you'd think she knows boys do ballet as well.

Repeatedly calling someone a failure is not pressuring, it's bullying.

It's also one thing to pressure one's child in the hopes he/she will perform better, it's another to mentally abuse one.

"My stomach quivered and my knees started to bounce with my shaken nerves."

I'm imagining knees bouncing right now. It ain't a pretty, nor realistic, sight.

"Jade wasn't pressuring me though, she handed me one and I gladly took the stick."

I think Abigail and I have different views on what is considered peer pressure.

That's the third time Abigail's mentioned Tucker's blue eyes within three minutes or less. As I said, this is going to be a loooong one.

" Tucker had treated me with nothing but kindness, even though I sucked at playing pool."

Yes, because your abilities to play pool directly reflects the way people should treat you.

Aaaaaaaand insta-love people. It's going to be a long ride.

"My breathing hitched in my stomach, giving me the worst case of butterflies."

It's been a while since someone breathed with their stomach. I don't think that has happened before. Guess we're dealing with a special snowflake.

And so her new best friend is using peer-pressure to get Abigail into smoking. Great start. And not stereotypical at all.

Break time. A long one, I think, is in order.

"Rachel shrugged her shoulders."

So few words, so many errors.

Second point of order: Abigail stated people know who she and her family are, yet she didn't fucking know her "mother" is really her stepmother? Yeah, again, no.

"Before I knew it, I smiled at my first stranger with kindness."

This girl has been living in New York City her whole life and this is the first time she smiles toward a stranger and it just so happens to be the future love interest? Yeah, don't think so.

That's a sad story and all, but it doesn't even begin to explain why the hell Abigail's father - who seems to love his daughter over everything else in the world - chose to stay with a woman that was emotionally abusing her own child. Maybe that would be the more pressing issue, not the fact that the woman isn't Abigail's mother.

"The other was with Caroline; she was free to do whatever she wanted. I didn't have to worry about school. We drank, had crazy sex wherever, [...]"

I don't think a dad like Abigail's would ever, ever, say to her he had an affair and had "crazy sex wherever" to his daughter. Sorry, not sorry.

Okay, I'm just going to say this right away, but this dialogue is ridiculous.

bitch please! you're giving me a headache! both of you are!