Status Updates From The Posterchildren: Origins...

well that turned around with some alacrity lol

nooooooo

“Our relationship is built on mild resentment, mutual disappointment, and the unfortunate fact that once upon a time, I fell out of Marcy’s vagina.”

June fuckin' Hovik, everyone

"I would love to take an afternoon to figure out exactly how many things rhyme with go fuck yourself in iambic pentameter, finals are coming up, so I’m booked solid.”

In this house we love and support June Hovik

Is that a baby gay polyamorous triad I detect? Hmm

oh my gods, June is having an Edna Mode moment

I love this

“And then you turned into Rambo, mi querida,” Sofia summed up, tossing her napkin over her plate.

“I wouldn’t go that far,” the Sheriff said, giving her wife a look.

“You did blow up the trailer, ma’am,” Jack pointed out, chin in his hand.

omg

People— normal people— were so fragile. He forgot how different he was until accidents reminded him of how tough he was by comparison. It was a cruel joke, as far as Ernest was concerned. He was all but immune to blunt force trauma, but the people he cared about could be reduced to tissue paper and pulp with a few good hits.

;_;

What's really appealing about this book isn't just that it's a superhero novel with a diverse cast that's treated with respect, but that it's a YA novel that actually feels like it was written for a YA audience.

uhm, that's not how a defribrillator works...

Who hurt my Zip?! >:(

Her breakdowns ended in broken things— like irreparably shattered interpersonal relationships, for example. Ernest’s breakdowns were delicious. Sad, but delicious.

“Are you seriously pausing for dramatic effec— ”

“THE VICIOUS VIGILANTE ACUPUNCTURIST!”

“I swear on Russian baby Jesus’ sweet little whitewashed behind—”

JUNE YOU ARE LIKE 15 OK

I can't y'all

“Whipped cream? For real? I will kiss you on the mouth if you’re talking about the kind of whipped cream that comes out of a can. The level of tongue involvement is totally up to you.”

JUNE pls

“Classmates. Friends. Who among you hasn’t wanted to punch a bully in the face? If you’re thinking to yourself ‘screw you, Maks, you don’t know me. I’ve never wanted to bust my knuckles against my bully’s impossibly hard cheekbones’, congratulations on your sainthood."

omfg

Professor Maillardet was a man of science, so he did what any scientist would do: he tested his daughter.

Excuse me, he did what

Ok, I love Ernest. He's like a golden retriever puppy. Someone hand me the template for the adoption papers meme STAT

“Wait a minute. Why would he call me your, uh— y’know— if he thought you were going after his girlfriend? That doesn’t make any sense.” Maks pressed a hand against his bruised cheek, his eyes widening in surprise.

“You mean I can’t have both?”

ALL HAIL THE BI DISASTER CHARACTER

He found his inner peace and kept it in a strangle hold.

#relatable

Her allergies were unbearable, as she had predicted. The greeting committee of Too Many Freakin’ Trees came paired with Too Much Freakin’ Pollen. She had knocked herself out with a hefty dose of antihistamines on the plane ride in from New York, but even her old pal Benadryl didn’t stand a chance against the leafy tyranny surrounding her.

I sympathize

He's 14?! Lord, why do YA novels always catch me off-guard with the characters' ages