Status Updates From Clown Tear Junkies

SMALL INDIE FILM PRODUCTION COMPANY SEEKS ACTORS/ACTRESSES FOR NEW FILM We are specifically looking for several males age eighteen and older who are cursed with extremely small penises (no one whose penis is bigger than a light switch when fully erect need apply). Also, males must be suicidal, though not necessarily suicidal because they have tiny penises. We also seek at least two males who are handy with chainsaws,

A bunch of short stories that are literally wild? An ADHD dream!

Physical copy not Kindle. But you know how it is with adding editions here

I...this is the fastest I've been confident that I've found a new favorite books. Oh my god. Oh my GOD

- The Scream, My Dog ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
- A Kind, Gay, Chinese Black Man ⭐⭐
- Give Courtney Cute Anything She Wants ⭐⭐⭐⭐
- The Audacity of Hope ⭐⭐⭐
- The Doghouse ⭐⭐⭐⭐

- Green Ireland: ⭐⭐⭐⭐
- What Ever Happened to Monty Morris? ⭐⭐⭐⭐
- A Salieri Puppet: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
- Hitler 'Stache: ⭐

- Actors and Actresses (and Others) Wanted: ⭐
- The Day My ID's ID Got Carded: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
- Long Necks: ⭐⭐⭐⭐

- Fishing With Higginsworth Fig VII: A Tale of Denial: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
- Ice Cream in Amerikkkka: ⭐⭐⭐
- Waiting on a Girl: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
- FUNERAL, CEMETERY, AUTOMOBILE, ALCOHOL: ⭐⭐⭐

- The Perfect Popcorn: A Recipe (or Confessions of a Lady-in-waiting): ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
- 811 : ⭐⭐⭐⭐

- I Flunked Kindergarten ⭐⭐⭐
- How Much Is That Hospice in the Window? ⭐⭐⭐
- The Date ⭐⭐⭐
- On Plant Zōhlzärt, It's Okay to Get With Your Grandpa ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
- Struggle of a Description ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

811 Was absolutely brilliant. Favourite story so far.

“It’s not shit. It’s Mozart. I like it loud. Why don’t you turn that crap off and listen to Mozart with me? Mozart’s music is immeasurably superior to Salieri’s. Everyone knows that. Salieri sucks a big blue dick. The only reason you even know Salieri existed is because of that retarded Amadeus movie. You know what I think? I think you still want to replace me with a living Salieri marionette.

If I tell you I have to kill u

Love it