Status Updates From You deserve each other

Nicholas glares, then dumps his prepared breading into my saucepan. “Hey!” “It’s going to suck, anyway.” “It is not.” “Your pasta’s overcooked. And you forgot to stir.” “Fudge.” I hurry to drain it. I rush back and stir, then throw in some seasoning. i“Interesting choice.” “Huh?” Nicholas taps one of the spice bottles I just used. Cinnamon.

I can’t breathe 😂😂😭😂😂

She’s so aggressively millennial

“[…] And I’m sure he’ll want his children to carry on the family name, too.”

“We’re not having children,” I declare. “I’m barren. I lost my uterus in a Ponzi scheme.”

THIS BOOK HAS ME IN TEARS😂😂😂😂😂