Status Updates From Ilias

‘As in the valleys of a mountainside when someone sees a snake and startles back, their body trembles and their cheeks turn pale and off they run—so godlike Paris, frightened of Menelaus, son of Atreus, drew back among the throng of Trojan fighters. But Hector saw him and reproached and shamed him.

“Pathetic Paris! Womanizer! Cheat! You are the very best at looking pretty. Oh, how I wish that you had never lived or

“One brother came to war dressed in gold ornaments, just like a girl. These baubles did not save his life, poor fool! The grandson of Aeacus, swift Achilles seized hold of him and killed him in the river. The victor took possession of his gold.”

👁️👄👁️

“[Achilles] was far superior, as were his horses. But he lay beside his fleet of steady, curving boats and raged at Agamemnon, shepherd of the people.”

Is he gonna do anything other than pout and be a brat bc Agamemnon stole the girl that Achilles basically kidnapped orrrr

“the Trojans all detested Paris” sí, mucho demasiado, solo sabe vestirse de valiente no hace nada NADA MÁS QUE BABOSADAS PARIS TE ODIO

Odysseys and Aias should just kiss atp…

Homer naming every single Ancient Greek town and all the NPCs in both armies like I've been dragged into someone's 3000 year old D and D campaign