Status Updates From All This Twisted Glory (Thi...

oh my god hazan is in love with alizeh.

no it’s okay i’ll take cyrus off her hands
i’ll honestly take hazan too what did she do to deserve them.
SHE DOES HAVE ALL THE MEN WRAPPED AROUND HER FINGER OH MY WORD

oh my god hazan is manhandling cyrus i didn’t know i needed this until now.

HAZAN BEING SO GODFORSAKEN AS TO WHY SARRA WONT EXPRESS CONCERN FOR HER SON BLEEDING OUT ON THE GROUND. it’s the way he doesn’t even LIKE cyrus yet he’s so baffled as to why she is like Yay! Come In For Breakfast! You Tried to Kill My Son, and hazan is like YES? AND ARENT YOU GOING TO HELP HIM WHAT???

HAZAN IS GOING TO PROTECT CYRUS.

MY HUSBANDS.

oh my goodness hazan is obi wan and kamran is anakin

Inhaling this

uh oh. the goon squad is inspecting my man.

i hope they slander him. yes yes kick him while he’s down!!!!

OH MY GOD CYRUS JUST CALLED THEM GOONS
WAS THAT NOT WHAT I CALLED THEM IN THE LAST BOOK.

now i have to marry him.

a: who are you talking to
c: my dragon
a: i want one
c: okay—
kaveh: sure as hell ain’t gonna be me
c: YOU WORK FOR ME
kaveh: AINT GONNA BE ME.

cyrus and i both mutually respect hazan bc he just said he was going to take of kamrans fucking head

“THE LOUD GIRL” WE ARE SO BACK

oh my god he has like meaningful conversations with his animals they know his wants and fears this is literally adorable

omg he communicates with them that’s so cute. HES A DISNEY PRINCESS

OMG THE DRAGON DOES HAVE A NAME KAVEH AWWWWWWW I WANT IT

c: in the three hours of my wake nobody is going to attack my castle— what the fuck
k: ding dong
h: ding dong
o: *feshtoon for ding dong*
mh: ding dong
d: ding dong

HE COULDNT DIE. NOT NOW NOT YET.
NOT. EVER.


WOOOOOO SHE CARES ABOUT HIM

“feed and water his dragon”

this is so not the time bc kamran going to lose his dick but HAHAHAHHAAHHWHA

because the only evidence we have of people cursing are hazan and cyrus saying fuck i assume every time someone swears they’re just going for the worst. set the bar high boy.

i’m waiting for cryus to collapse in her presence ??

bro i fucking hate kamran like stfu dude literally nobody likes u.