Status Updates From The Ever-Dark

Feels EXTREMELY rushed. Chapter is unbearably sloppy, even compared to pacing issues previously, as the prose doesn’t seem to have as much thought in it. Feels like the first draft of a sudden idea that was written in without editing to make it actually fit. Also VERY disappointing to have the major conflict the last few chapters were leading up to brushed over with a couple of careless sentences. Considering a DNF

Chapter 6 is definitely the weakest chapter so far. Large blocks of text about multiple topics/actions that should have been broken up into separate paragraphs, very unnatural-reading dialogue, a lot of exposition in the narration trying to tell us every little detail no matter if its actually relevant to what is happening, and more rushed than usual. To put it perhaps a little harshly: it feels like a first draft.

Has been good so far, besides feeling rushed. Narrative prose is very good, though some of the dialogue feels stilted and unnatural; used more for exposition than natural interaction in some parts. If pacing was improved, this issue could probably be avoided.

It’s alright. Story is interesting but pacing could be improved. Chapter 2 felt like several different chapters pushed together and rushed. As the story so far is supposed to have happened over several days it would have been nice to have seen each day/event expanded on instead of shown for 2-4 paragraphs and then moved on from.

Not terrible, feels pretty rushed though. Sorta just going “Oh? Okay. I guess this is happening now.” the entire time. Can’t really get a feel for who the character is so far. Has lots of potential though and I’m hoping for a reason to actually care about Violet other than “she’s the main character” because like… who IS she?

Nope. DNF