Status Updates From أريد أن أموت ولكنني ما زلت ...

I just, I don’t know. My life before I took medication has become the past, and I can just forget the memories of that time, but I think I’m getting worse. So I keep castigating myself, and because I’m so mired in it and keep thinking of myself as sick, I’m making the sickness even worse, which makes me feel like it’s all too much. And this drives me up the wall, which makes me think of harming myself.