Status Updates From Tentacles and Tides: A Cres...

Yes girl, thank you for having morals of not sleeping with the guy before the secrets are told

… the descriptor makes it sound like his cock literally is moving on its own accord and it was not an image I was expecting

They are maybe about to fuck in the sand and this idiot goes: “I might, um… peak…”

👏JUST 👏 SAY 👏 CUM 👏

An accidental slip up of the correct words does not affection make - do not be suckered girl

No fucking girl would listen to the advice of a man she barely knows, who essentially stalked her home and broke in during a storm, then starts demanding she stay at an inn. You don’t know her financial situation, you don’t know her, and at this moment certainly have no say in her life.
Please stop with MMC’s like this please

Uh, no. ‘That kind of stubbornness’ often gets people hurt, injured or sometimes killed. Mostly hurt though

What?
“… I wasn’t used to feeling, not organically at least.”
So are you trying to tell me that this guy usually feels all the emotions of others around him with touch, absorbs them, and yet he rarely feels emotion himself… sounds like my father

She’s fucking right though?

Octavius is not doing it for me. I get grumpy but this is just rude and anti-social leaning

Laughed my ass off at the condom jokes.