Status Updates From The Mage in the Iron Mask (...

The frequent and highly varied alternate descriptions of Passepout as, "the pudgy thespian," "the chubby thespian," and "the portly actor," have now been joined by "the corpulent thespian." Such sublime writing.

Oh really? You had a friend named Seau Raisis who had a problem with dry, flaking skin, which he treated with oil made by the cleric Oleigh? Fuck you.

So this random weaponmaster is doing a weird training montage. At this point, he speared an apple (tossed by a servant) with his dagger. Then this line:

'They were no sooner back in their place than the master swordsman tossed the dagger-bissected apple into the air and quickly slashed it in mid-flight, chopping the apple in two, and freeing the dagger blade from its fructose prison.'

ITS FRUCTOSE PRISON

No foolin'. This is terrible.

Part Three: The Plot, The Plan, & The Ploy

Mage Mason McKern

Szass Tam and the party’s tank sightings!

Part Two: The Swordsman, The High Blade, His Wife, & His Brother (okay I think this might be kicking off proper now lol)

Picking this back up post-D&D movie since it’s about the Harpers and the Thayans. In a real Forgotten Realms mood here lately.

I’ve been kinda slowly picking at this for a bit and it’s cute! I’m always happy to just futz around for an hour or two in the Forgotten Realms.