Status Updates From Our Options Have Changed (O...

“Cooking is like love; it should be entered into with abandon or not at all.”

SPOILER!!!

He’s fastening delicate chain behind my neck. Suspended from chain are thin circular bands of different colors of gold that interlock. I touch them gently. Spread out, they form globe. A world. Six bands of gold.

“You’ve become my world, Chloe,”

“I want you to remember that every time you look at this necklace, or feel it against your skin. Especially at work, where I can’t tell you myself.

She’s electric with fear, that full-body, full-throated screaming that babies have, where all the emotions pour out at once because there are no boundaries to contain them.

Her birth mother is Asian and Holly’s eyes are dark, but rounded. Chloe doesn’t talk much about the birth father, but I’m guessing he wasn’t Asian, given Holly’s features.

a thirty-page manual clearly written by Chloe, who should turn her talents toward writing pandemic preparation manuals for the CDC.

You know what would be great right now? One of those tanks from the Oxygen bar at O. There may be no scientific evidence to support the claim, but a hit of pure oxygen, scented like gin and tonic, would really take the edge off my separation anxiety. Breakfast of champions, zero calories and no prescription required. Pricey, though.

It’s my very own MulchingMama. According to the instruction booklet, by using the enclosed sample diapers (refills sold online for $150 per case) and processing the soiled diapers through my MulchingMama unit, I can turn Poop to Profit. And potentially save the planet.

“There should be another version called Married Twister,” he continues. “Or maybe just Twisted Together. Because when you’re together, the problems are shared. There are four hands instead of just two. If one of you has a hand on the mother-in-law circle, for example, the other person can cover the kids circle. You help each other stay balanced.”

“If Holly grows up seeing that you are scared of loving relationship, she will learn love is something to avoid. None of us want that little girl to ever have unhappy moment, but she will. What she needs to know is that she’ll get through it. Sadder but wiser, as my grandmother used to say. So you have to be her model. You have to be brave for her. You have to teach her that love is not chicken broth!”

“Look @ this – thick & full of good stuff, tomatoes & meat & spices … simmering for long time over low flame, so intense flavor. Chips on side for texture, sour cream for contrast. instead, I could have served chicken broth. Perfectly good, but thin & boring. you’d be just as hungry after you finished.” You can see why she is successful as health journalist. makes unusual connections to illustrate points.

he misses the winning touchdown. He’s mad, but I don’t care. I scored.

I think we have an infinite capacity to add love to our lives. You had room for Holly. I think you have room for Nick.

Holly arrived all by herself. She didn’t bring a French wife and three kids who call during sex.

You’re not exactly free of baggage yourself, girlfriend.

Twister is what dating in your 30s & 40s is like.

circles are different parts of your life. you have hand for kids, and foot for job. Maybe other foot is former relationships, exes.

“Now I have one hand left for new relationship. spinner points to red circle, but it’s little too far to stretch. I try hard, but I just... can’t... reach...” I collapse dramatically on carpet. “I fall down. Game over.”

Ten minutes ago, I was yelling at my past.

Now I’m listening to my present scream.

What sound does the future make?

If you can name a demon, you can vanquish it.

Let it remain without definition and it thrives on chaos.

Simone stiffens at the word Daddy. She’s always preferred Papa.

Which is why I’m Dad and Daddy. She got to name the kids. I chose what they call me.

She is from a family with money, a long line of famous sculptors to royalty throughout Europe.

She was a rare bird, exotic and alluring.

I was the solid American, dashing and new.

New World met Old World.

She colonized me.

Simone smiles, her face sweet and genuine for a flicker of time, just enough to make me think of how she looked the day we met on campus during my freshman orientation at RISD, her senior year. The age difference never bothered me; she seemed to enjoy it.

Roots and wings, the saying goes. Children need both.

I’ve given them roots.

Their mother cared more about her own wings than theirs.

The leading compliments aren’t designed to flatter me. They’re designed to trigger a similar response from me.

But I’m not Pavlov’s dog any longer.

And Simone’s bell doesn’t work.

He and Simone were never exactly close. That’s like saying Donald Trump is just a tad unpopular in Scotland.

there’s more of an understanding now that families look different in many ways, but it’s only the love that matters.

“House rule is that mothers of children under three months do not wait on adults. I’ll be right back.”

“But it’s my house!”

“But it’s my rule,”

“and Holly is not allowed to light candles until she is twenty. At least.”

“All three of my children could open a Champagne bottle properly by age eight. No big pops. Just a tiny puff of air. We just have to teach her to point the cork away from her face.”

“I dialed the number on the menu,” he laughs. “I didn’t cook it myself. Any ten-year-old could produce the same meal, if they can pronounce ‘tom yam goong.’”

“Ten-year-olds can’t pop a Champagne cork, though,”

“Not sure that’s long enough.”

“That’s what she said.”

“Mine are in college now. I’d trade the freedom for a day of their babyhood in a heartbeat.”

“You ever start crying with your baby?”

“Can’t say I ever did.”

“It’s pretty embarrassing. Especially when you cry louder than the infant.”

“Why do you call your mother by her first name?”

“Because it’s slightly less painful than using her preferred form of address.”

“Which is?”

“Your Majesty.”

I love picking Holly up from her naps. I get so excited to see her again, feel the weight and warmth of her little body.