Status Updates From C.S. Lewis on Grief

So enjoyed excerpts on p 10, 12

“No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear. I am not afraid, but the sensation is like being afraid. The same fluttering in the stomach, the same restlessness, the yawning. I keep on swallowing…and no one ever told me about the laziness of grief…only as a dog-tired man wants an extra blanket on a cold night; he’d rather lie there, shivering than get up and find one.”

I want her back as an ingredient in the restoration of my past.

Part of every misery is, so to speak, the misery’s shadow or reflection: the fact that you don’t merely suffer but have to keep on thinking about the fact that you suffer.

"Whatever fools may say, the body can suffer twenty times more than the mind. The mind has always some power of evasion. At worst, the unbearable thought only comes back and back, but the physical pain can be absolutely continuous. pain is like the steady barrage on a trench in World War One, hours of it with no let-up for a moment. Thought is never static; pain often is." A Grief Observed