Status Updates From The Secret Diary of Mycroft...

I'm not entirely ignorant of how these things work: what starts with Victoria Sandwich and muffins invariably progresses to toast and jam and sardine sandwiches, and before a fellow knows it, he is knee-deep in bills, children and the complexities of home plumbing.

“Queer fellow. When they asked him what he wanted to be in later life, he said eccentric.”
“Is that a profession?” asked the Home Secretary, Lord Snoring.
“I would rather say it was a calling,” said the Prime Minister.

Had I known how my life was to change, I should not have returned home that day but run off to sea. I say this, although I doubt I would have done so, even if the chance had presented itself. The sea is too quarrelsome for me. Given that I was once taken unwell in the bath, I daresay that a life on the ocean waves would not have suited me at all.