Status Updates From The Ledberg Runestone: The ...

Sam:"You want to tell me why I picked you up in the middle of nowhere, pissing on yourself drunk and covered in blood?"
Jonah:"I couldn't have been that bad..."
Sam:"No. You literally pissed on yourself. You were that bad! Then you threw up in the back of my car."

"I try to set the bar low... Keeps people from expecting too much out of me." - Jonah Heywood

Melly:"And where are we, exactly?"
Jonah:"My old man's house."
Melly:"Oh... And how is he going to feel about you bringing strange girls home in the middle of the night?"
Jonah:"I'm hoping he feels better about it now than he did when I was a teenager."

Thaddeus:"You know, Heywood. I was thinking about you last night..."
Jonah:"Hey, to each his own, but I don't swing that way, chief~"

I was literally thinking, "This guy's dad strikes me as the type who would have a shotgun in his closet," and then he shows up with a shotgun on the next page. Perfect lol.