Status Updates From Christmas in Kentbury

(John Cusack and Kate Beckinsale … ooooh! A “Serendipity” reference!)

Landon: “Serendipity” was actually filmed in Central Park, not Rockefeller Center.

Kentbury is in Vermont.

Dad loved Mom so much, he’s never moved on (after her passing in a car accident during another snowstorm). When we (kids) ask him, he always says he has us. We are the best part of the two of them - he doesn’t need more. One day, they’ll find each other in heaven, where they can be together again. Forever.

Dr. Gonzalez: Do you masturbate?

Lee: Do you, Landon? Because you might run out of sperm before I can use it.

Dr. Gonzalez: Actually, if you don’t do it, start doing it often. The way your body produces the sperm is based on demand. And you can help him. Masturbation is a healthy activity, and if you do it with a willing partner, it can help you grow as a couple.

Further correction: Landon is 34.

Most of the cars are slowing down (on the snow-packed roads). Not us. Landon Miller doesn’t believe in slowing down during a storm. “We shouldn’t linger around drivers who doubt themselves. Those are the ones who cause accidents.”