Status Updates From Capturing the Devil (Stalki...

"You truly astound me with the direction your filthy mind travels in, Wadsworth. We're at a crime scene; have a care."

CACKLINGGGG

"There is a body."
Thomas drew back, his hand clutching his chest. He looked from me to the body, his eyes going wide. "Is that what this is? Here I was convinced it was a Winter Ball. Shame I wore my best suit."
"How clever."
"You do say you like a man with a rather large---"
"Stop. I beg of you. My uncle is RIGHT there."
"---Brain."
THIS INTERACTION IS GOLD

"Perhaps you'll be the one getting me warm. I'm not opposed to either scenario, really. Ladies' choice."
"Scoundrel."
"I love when you whisper sweet nothings to me."
LAWDDDDDD

". . . I imagine I could get you warm soon enough."

THOMAS CRESSWELL YOU UTTER FIEND MY DIGNITY IS IN TATTERS

He stood and held out his hand. "Shall we see about solving another gruesome murder, my love?"
This line right here sums up their entire relationship. Argue with a wall.

"We'll find new ways of navigating the world together, Wadsworth. . . . Anything at all in the universe you need, we will make it so. And if you'd prefer to do it on your own, I will step aside. I also promise to keep my opinion mostly to myself."
"Mostly?"
"Unless it's vastly inappropriate. Then I'll share it with gusto."

"Your happiness is always necessary to me."
WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN ALL MY LIFEEEEEEEEEE ALL MY LIFEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

"I was going to suggest 'like you wish to destroy my virtue at once,' but I suppose yours isn't a terrible deduction, either."
AHHHHHHHHHH

HE DESIGNED HER SHOES. I REPEAT. HE. DESIGNED. HER. SHOES.
OH MY GAWD WHY IS THIS MAN NOT REAL????