Status Updates From The Posthumous Memoirs of B...

"But the book is tedious, it reeks of the grave...for the book’s greatest flaw is you, reader. You are in a hurry to grow old, and the book moves slowly; you love direct, robust narration, and a smooth and regular style, and this book and my style are like drunkards, they veer right and left, stop and go, grumble, bellow, cackle, threaten the skies, slip, and fall…".

OK yes, guilty as charged.