Status Updates From Paperbacks from Hell: The T...

"Since time immemorial, humankind's greatest natural predator has been the clown."

“Skeletons are the worst. They lurk inside our skin, waiting to jump out and use our computers, dance obscenely in graveyards, and wield enormous scythes.”

“….most of us would be hard-pressed to tell the difference between a scorpion grimacing in rage and one giggling with glee. Maybe that’s why they hate us. We spend so much time swatting, slapping, spraying, and squeezing them to death that we never take the time to get to know them as individuals.”

“Hating clowns is a waste of time because you’ll never loathe a clown as much as he loathes himself. But a magician? Magicians think they’re wise and witty, full of patter and panache, walking around like they don’t deserve to be shot in the back of the head and dumped in a lake.”