Status Updates From The Comedienne's Guide to P...

This narrator keeps being over emotional while eating and saying that food “lodged in my windpipe” and every time I’m like “oh no she’s choking!” but she just means a lump in her throat because she doesn’t appear to know that the food goes down a different goddamn pipe and it really takes me out of the scene. “Why are these people talking rather than doing the Heimlich?!”

I’ve got to stop reading YA books: adolescent narrative voice always makes me want to strangle someone

Ok it’s not just the sullen teen narrator, the actual author appears to believe that sometimes someone is “no longer a dyke” (and I quote) because they’re now with a guy. Jesus Christ

The author thinks that the phrase “death becomes her” means “she dies” instead of “death suits her”. “I’d be happy if only I could have X thing one time before death became me.” Is a meaningless sentence.

I realise that this is about a sullen teen growing into a better person but I sure hope she cools it with the biphobia soon