Status Updates From A Scot Is Not Enough (Scott...

“Sniffing my barrels is not a crime.” “What if I sniffed elsewhere?” SIR!!!

“…absorbing the pleasurable shiver that followed her fingers in his pocket.” Ew ew ew ew ew.

Gotta love a bush man.

“Head down, arse up was not a defensible position.” Yeah man, you just got caught head first is a barrel, lawyer your way out of this one.

He is obsessed by the fact she has small titties. “(As judged by her meager bodice)” “Attractive but not a beauty… She is a carnal invitation in the flesh” bro leave her alone!!

Ok literally what is a maid-cum-servant?

“He saluted her cleavage!” WHAT??!?!?

SHE’S PICKING OUT STOCKINGS SHE THINKS HER STALKER WOULD LIKE BEST BASED ON HIS REACTIONS WHILE WATCHING HER FROM ACROSS THE STREET!! I am so entertained.

“‘The man following you is not a fish.’ ‘With delicious calves like that, I hope not’”

I have never seen the words “sexual” and “congress” in the same sentence before.

Mr. Sloane please keep your primal kink to yourself.

*after ogling her cleavage in a portrait of her* “‘I wouldn’t know what to do with this woman’… ‘Correction. I know what to do with a woman. But this’—he waved a hand over the page—‘is a delicate matter.’” I AM CACKLING!!

Page three and someone already has gout.

I got this book at a Rite Aid…