Status Updates From Time Is a Mother

I had been
looking for a sound to change
the light in the room.

You can be nothing
& still breathing. Believe me.

but the birds are just holes in the gunshot
sky oh man the aubade
left to rot into afternoon
when every word
was forgotten as soon as the hand moved across the page away
from the car crash
but we deserve more than this you said this is only the beginning each night
the same snowfields
crushed & littered across the room

in the courtyard yesterday
I'm still afraid
of butterflies
how they move so much
like a heart
on fire I know it doesn't
make sense this pill
a bone-shard of will
unwilling me Peter
I feel sorry
for anyone
who has to die despite
the fact I was
fifteen once but
who knows I tell lies
to keep from
falling away
trom me you
wouldn't
believe it a man