Status Updates From Soyons tous des féministes

'So, no, this conversation is about gender. Some people will say, ‘Oh, but women have the real power: bottom power.’ (This is a Nigerian expression for a woman who uses her sexuality to get things from men.)'

Again, interesting correlation with Western gay culture.

'Cooking, by the way, is a useful and practical life skill for a boy to have.'

Which is invariably coded 'gay' in Western culture. And hair dressing, interior decorating, and flower arrangements.

The problem with gender is that it prescribes how we should be rather than recognizing how we are. Imagine how much happier we would be, how much freer to be our true individual selves, if we didn’t have the weight of gender expectations.

We teach girls that they cannot be sexual beings in the way boys are. If we have sons, we don’t mind knowing about their girlfriends. But our daughters’ boyfriends? God forbid.

Our society teaches a woman at a certain age who is unmarried to see it as a deep personal failure. While a man at a certain age who is unmarried has not quite come around to making his pick.

The harder a man feels compelled to be, the weaker his ego is. And then we do a much greater disservice to girls, because we raise them to cater to the fragile egos of males.

We spend too much time teaching girls to worry about what boys think of them. But the reverse is not the case. We don’t teach boys to care about being likeable.

Gender as it functions today is a grave injustice. I am angry. We should all be angry. Anger has a long history of bringing about positive change.

There are slightly more women than men in the world – 52 per cent of the world’s population is female but most of the positions of power and prestige are occupied by men.

Lagos is a metropolis of almost twenty million people, with more energy than London, more entrepreneurial spirit than New York, and so people come up with all sorts of ways to make a living.

Anyway, since feminism was un-African, I decided I would now call myself a Happy African Feminist. Then a dear friend told me that calling myself a feminist meant that I hated men. So I decided I would now be a Happy African Feminist Who Does Not Hate Men. At some point I was a Happy African Feminist Who Does Not Hate Men And Who Likes To Wear Lip Gloss And High Heels For Herself And Not For Men.

(Nigerians, as you might know, are very quick to give unsolicited advice.)

again reading this this weekend during the storm. ahhhhh i hope i don’t get radicalized nooooo