Status Updates From In a Jam

“I have a lot of experience convincing myself that people love me. I don’t even realize I’m doing it until those people make it painfully clear that they don’t love me, they never loved me.

Okay i take that back i love you shay🥹

Shay start to piss me off a little bit 🤗

“I love your hair like this.”
“Short? Or slightly pink?”
“Both,”
🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭

“Allow me to make myself clear. I don’t give a pickled fuck how or why we came to be married. You are my wife. If you need some fun, you’ll call me. I’ll be the one taking care of you. I’ll give you anything you want, including a properly prepared gin and tonic. If you can’t accept that, you’re welcome to divorce me now.”

Yes sir🫡🫡