Status Updates From Pirate's Conquest

OK, question: do barracudas eat people? The big ones? I'm seriously doubting that....

So, the pirate hero keeps a diary--that was conveniently snatched from his Notoriously Renowned pirate ship, that can obviously be recognized by the "Scorpion" crest, and is boldly sitting in London port, as pretty as you please. :) LMAO I wish I was making this up!

This book... ROFL. o.o Swiss cheese plotline and cracker characters. >:] But omg, what lovely new shelves it will bring!

Waking up to someone nudging you, as your text-to-speech option is describing in elicit detail how your H/h are working up to a dirty deed with everyone in the house capable of hearing it all go down. Priceless. :)

I has a feeling..someone's gonna get kidnapped. I mean, what's left? He's already seduced her, and then blamed her for ALMOST -making- him rape her. ;) Lol

Having never met the heroine, his enemy some miles away, he decided to sail to her beach, and spots her. I kid you not. There's some underline premonition going on here. "You are mine, goddess of the night, and I, your master." And after some years down the road, she plots against his seductive ass. "His ship must be somewhere in English waters. She would find it, sneak on board, and obtain something of his." LOL

Skimming.

Why does every heroine lately have violet eyes? Nothing wrong with plain old green or brown.