Status Updates From La casa del Destino (The Mi...

Those bright small moments pass, and you're left wondering when the next might come along
But there is a difference now, Nella supposes, because she knows that the next moment of happiness will come. Before, in this house, and later in Amsterdam, she could never be sure, and then she was trapped in the knot of her own doubt.

She feels exhausted. She has spent so many hours, weeks and months planning for a day like this. She thinks about Pastor Becker's admonishment: *Go, and think on the time you bave wasted.* She is the biggest squanderer of them all.

'Thea, you are not like other girls?'
'I am not?'
'You are infinitely superior?
Thea wants him to enumerate her so-called superiority, to parcel it out in understandable blocks. She thinks of the Eleonors and Catarinas of this city, and why exactly Jacob thinks her to be so different. She suspects that she might dread his answer, that it is rooted in unforgiving soil.

Bella feels her own statements wash back over her. They are surprisingly cynical to her, heard from the mouth of another.