Status Updates From Star Wars: The Courtship of...

One chapter in an I have no idea most of the words it’s saying to me but I’m keeping track of the plot better than I expected so I’m counting that as a win

How many prisoners are at this prison? Gethzerion just killed 50 of them, then threatened to kill 500 if Han didn't comply, then another 500 after that if he still didn't comply. It might not be completely accurate, but that's probably in the ballpark at least. That's a lot of fuckin' prisoners for a prison on a backwater planet that was abandoned shortly after it was built. Doesn't make much sense.

I guess I should switch to page count instead of percent, due to these SW ebooks having the last ~30% be filled with other novel excerpts. It's still not completely accurate, but probably closer. In fact, the only reason I ever switched to percentage was because the old Kindle Fire I first started reading ebooks on didn't display the page number. But I've been using a Kindle Paperwhite for years now, and it does.

Wait, wtf? Han just said he knew some port authority codes from the Old Republic. How? He was a child when the Empire began. Only an adult would know codes like that. I know this was pre-prequels so the timeline of the Empire being 20 years wasn't set in stone, but still. Han was in his late 20s during Episode IV. Does Wolverton think the Empire was only around for a few years??

Rancors being able to speak to one another and tell stories is dumb. They're just supposed to be monsters, man, don't overthink it. But it's one of the least egregious things about this novel, so whatever.
Isolder comes up with the harvester droid plan because they're apparently Hapan models. But Hapes was supposed to be isolationist for the past 20+ years, so what is a Hapan droid doing on a backwater planet? HMM?!

Luke thinking Isolder is somehow suitable for Jedi training even though he has absolutely no reason to think so is stupid. Han asserting that the deed he has means he owns everything on the planet is stupid and childlike. Owning an ENTIRE PLANET is nonsense. The Emperor being 'afraid' of the Nightsisters is laughable. They are primitives. They could not withstand the Empire's military might. This is so stupid.

Luke is far too wise for the point in the timeline this is set at. The Jedi Academy trilogy is still a few years off. Luke barely knows shit, yet Wolverton has him act like he's already a proficient Jedi.
Hell, even Threepio barely seems like the actual character. How do you fuck that up?! Easiest character to write, and yet he still can't get it right. God damn, this book sucks way more ass than I remembered.

Han ordered strikes against Zsinj in an attempt to weaken the border and then resigned his commission. That doesn't make any sense. They wouldn't keep following those orders, then.
The infamous sticking point of this book is how Han shoots Leia with a mind control gun, kidnaps her, and this leads to them getting married. I can't begin to describe how utterly stupid all of this is.

Han overhears a group of people talking in a cantina. First they comment on how scruffy he looks, then start gushing over Isolder. This is ridiculous nonsense. One guy says that street vendors 'down on Corsucant' are selling Isolder posters, but they are on Coruscant. You wouldn't say 'down on' about the planet you are currently on. Wonder if he originally had that scene set elsewhere, then forgot to rewrite that.

God damn, I don't remember this book sucking THIS much. It's so bad thus far. Both Han and Leia are acting nothing like their actual selves. Leia falling so quickly for Isolder and just brushing Han to the side kind of shows that Wolverton must have had a fairly low opinion on women...
Speaking of Wolverton, he died ~4 years ago. Second SW author I've read in a row that has died early. Weird coincidence

I always kind of knew this, but it's never really struck me fully until now how... "interesting" the concept of Hapes/the Hapan people are. It's basically just whitewashed Japan in space. Obviously the Hapan - Japan connection is blatant. Their ships are called Battle Dragons. They are a cluster of planets (like the archipelago). They were isolationist. But they are very white-coded, often having red or blonde hair.

If Vader had hunted down this Jedi Master and killed him, there's no fucking way he would've just left the Master's lightsaber laying around. I know this was written in 94, so it predates Order 66 by 11 years. But taking (or at least destroying) lightsabers of the Jedi you are killing is just common fucking sense.

Solo Command leads directly into this novel - it even says so at the end of it. I've only read this book once before. I put it off for a very long time (I would see it on shelves quite often). I knew it was important, because it's about Han and Leia getting married. But I just wasn't interested in it. I remember not really liking it when I did finally read it - bit of a slog. Let's see what I think now.