Aishwarya > Recent Status Updates

"It's someone's body and it belongs to them, and the government has no right to tell them what they can and cannot do with it."??? Well, the argument sounds good but there seems to be something genuinely worrisome about it.

The plot is slowly moving and there's no improvement except how Gilbert is now a little bit close to Mrs. Graham when compared to chapter 1. Probably because he's curious or simply be just enjoys her company or he wants to be validated by a woman who has an upper hand over him (to comfort his fragile ego?) I'm not sure about anything at this point. It's like a long rant of "nothing."

The plot is slowly moving and there's no improvement except how Albert is now a little bit close to Mrs. Graham when compared to chapter 1. Probably because he's curious or simply be just enjoys her company or he wants to be validated by a woman who has an upper hand over him (to comfort his fragile ego?) I'm not sure about anything at this point. It's like a long rant of "nothing."

I definitely don't like where the story is going. Nah-uh.

WEN!
At times I have so much hatred towards Wen rather than Leonard because if it weren't for Wen, neither Eric nor Andrew would have to go through this mess. But at other times, I pity her because as a small child she has to endure so much, witness murders, assaults, and her dad's being tortured. Where is this story going??

So far, the writer talks about,
- low self esteem, toxic sister, codependent yet feel bereft when they leave, being an empathetic person is draining, unprocessed anger, we are our own mountains, ignore "what others might think of me" thoughts, seeking attention to feel validated by others, forgive bullies and let go of the pain, and what you feed your mind becomes your life.

Well, so far, Vronsky talks about Jeffrey Dahmer and Jack the Ripper with tons of references to the mediaeval serial killer vampires who were organised and werewolves who were disorganised. It makes sense in a way. And surprisingly, I haven't thought about the origin of these mythical creatures in this lens. And the writer's style is concise and clear.

"Similarly, being able to convey yourself simply using ordinary English words is far more important than being able to write poetry, having an extensive vocabulary or speaking seven different foreign languages." - why does it feel like he's contradicting himself? Whatever he has said in the initial 44 pages are very unclear, fragmented and seems out of place in the reality we all live in!!

I have been putting off this book for over a year now, scared to face the truth, finding a reason not to read it. Well, here I go. When I began reading, this quote hit me in my gut & I felt that I should probably finish this book, hoping to get some takeaway - "The weird thing about depression is that, even though you might have more suicidal thoughts, the fear of death remains the same."

As a reader you cannot resist being empathetically compassionate towards Asha albeit her naivete. I would dare not say I pity Asha because I don't. I knew Asha would figure it out late and she did. Would she be able to realise that she was the grain of sand in Mahin's eye?

Well, it's still Mahin obsessing over Binodini and in the process, he seems to be having conflicting thoughts about Bihari and Asha. At moments, he wants to rid Asha from his life and at other times, he wants her to save him from going astray. Mahin is a man who doesn't have control over his thoughts and acts immediately upon it. Nah! I don't like where the story is going.

Bihari knows! That guy sensed Binodini's true nature yet slipped right into her grasp. Perhaps Bihari innately knew that before Binodini became this woman who coveted her friend's husband, she once was a gullible and naive girl who dreamt of love, building a family with her spouse. And probably that's why Bihari failed to see behind her facade.

Okay, four of them introduced eachother to Andrew, Eric and Wen. Now what? Apocalypse? Messengers? With weapons? Intruders who are polite but breaks in with and cleans the broken shards of glass in the living room? What in the actual world?

Mahendra (Mahin) seems like a momma's boy and Rajalakshmi (RL) seems to constantly blame someone or the other for how her son behaves with her. RL is a hypocrite who pampers her son but doesn't like it when Mahin pampers her girl-wife Ashalata, who is innocent in all aspects. This mother son duo needs therapy, ASAP.

It feels eerie and I am rooting for Eric & Andrew! Even in that chaotic situation, Eric asks those strangers to go away nicely and reading Eric's character gives me regenerated hope to live in this selfish and cruel world. Am I being dramatic? Perhaps. Perhaps not.

"Someone knocks on the front door. Seven knocks (Wen counts them); quiet, polite and in rhythm. Leonard said seven wasn't always lucky." — Well, so far the writer has provided us with a vague outline of who Eric and Andrew are, as a couple and it made me smile with warmth! I also loved the slow building of the story with Leonard, trying to warn Wen about something bad and Wen trying to protect her dads.

Mountains darken —
robbing the scarlet
from maple leaves
– Buson
These lines!!

"searching for love in all the wrong places, thrilled by the chase, until I hate it."
Rose Brik is my recent favourite! The verses are painfully relatable, haunting, and real!

I am not entirely sure of what I am feeling right now. Too much pain from Najeeb's words, or should I say the way JK has translated? Either way, the narration is heartbreaking. Setting aside the book for a moment, can we appreciate the film for making people read the actual book? Just read this quote,
"I was neither bothered about yesterday nor worried about tomorrows. Just focused on managing the today's."

I picked this one solely due to the hype on Instagram. Even though it is evident that this book is designed in interview style, the conversation between Rangan and Ratnam is bland for some reason. Rangan tries to get more out of the director but fails to do so. Let me push myself a bit more to understand the logic behind all the unnecessary pufferies.

"The closer I get to love, the further away it seems." - The story of my life! Parental love? Potential romantic love interest? Sibling/cousin love? Everything seems like a mirage from where I stand.

"What never was,/What could have been,/was more to me/than anything else." - We usually put our love interest on a pedestal and worship them. When they reject or deny or invalidate our feelings, we are heartbroken. What's wrong here? Everything. See them as humans, they are just as flawed as you. When you see them for what they are, nothing affects you deeply.

"The greatest injustice I have suffered has come under the pretense of love." - How hurt was the poet when they wrote this? How hurt was I when I read this and cried an entire night?

"The things she asked" brought back so much pain and trauma. Sometimes I despise modern poetry due to the sole fact that they can have complete control over the readers in the aspects of pain, and raw wounds.

When we say fear isn't a reason but an excuse to fall out of love or stop one from falling in love, it is true. As humans, we need an excuse to put off long term commitment, as long as possible. It can either be of past trauma or just pure selfishness.

"The kind of sadness that is intangible. Like the presence of an ache where you can't pinpoint exactly where it hurts, you just know it does."
When I tell people that I'm sad but I don't know why, this is exactly what I'm feeling. This is where I am mentally.

"All I want now is a rainy day, a roaring fire, you and I talking about how quickly the time has gone."

Wow! I picked up modern poetry after a while. A year to be exact. It's definitely living upto my expectations after being crushed (in a good way!) by rh Sin.

When will the story begin? Is there a story to begin with or just rantings of a man who thinks HE IS JUSTICE while he is just another trash who does the same with Adeline? This book is crazy and I got this close to moving this read to "DNF". But wait! I am somehow going to finish HA #01 and going to write a review on why people should avoid reading this. That's the least "JUSTICE" I can do to the reading community.

Ten percent in and I don't like it. Not one bit. TBH, it's like reading Wattapad fanfiction. I should've heeded the writer's warning before completely ignoring it and jumping into this shitty narrative.