ej :) > Recent Status Updates

well i didn't think this was my usual kind of book???

oh hey a jump back to the first kiss! cute!

i love olive describing demisexuality but not quite labeling herself. make your way out of the closet eventually babes, please.

ALSO I'VE SAID IT ONCE I'LL SAY IT AGAIN A MAN THAT YEARNS IS A MAN THAT EARNS

"i just want her to be safe. and happy. and to have what she needs." hey buddy so that is called being in love with somebody.

ADAM CARLSON I FORGIVE YOU FOR EVERYTHING ACTUALLY

i hate a third act breakup

if this is a third act breakup, i am throwing my freaking phone.

that whole moment read like it came straight out of a quinton tarantino script. ew.

A 👏🏽 MAN 👏🏽 THAT 👏🏽 YEARNS 👏🏽 IS 👏🏽 A 👏🏽 MAN 👏🏽 THAT 👏🏽 EARNS 👏🏽

if a man ever reassures my anxiety of how much i want him by placing my hand over his erection, i am going to punch him. that is icky, i'm not sorry.

so it's been a while since i watched a fast and furious movie, but tokyo drift did give us an iconic song so it's definitely up there. maybe not the best movie, but pretty good.

also, why do they know what foot tastes like. why do we keep saying things taste like foot. you shouldn't know what that tastes like.

EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW

you know what...solid advice. i should be carrying myself with the confidence of a mediocre white man more.

olive please do not say the guy you are in love with is a giraffe. that raises more questions. just don't.

...ow.

oh the begging not to get a flu shot you're so me adam carlsen.

impossible and improbable. i love seeing those words together, reminds me of somebody....

UNICORN FRAPPE?! WHEN DOES THIS BOOK TAKE PLACE???

"he was warm and solid in a pleasant, soothing way" I WISH I NEVER HAD TO READ THAT

ah yes, my favorite date idea: giving each other third degree burns.

they're not parting ways on september 29th. calling it now.

...WHAT IS AN IMAC?!?!

COOL RANCH DORITOS MY GOAT

honestly though we would have just spent the whole book calling him kiss dude or the guy, glad to know he does indeed have a name

let me guess, he's actually a professor and is like 30

...oh.

kys 😭 this man is thousands of years old how did he get this caught up on modern day stuff

...you've got to be kidding me

oh oh oh ick, don't call her your whore wtf ick

oh yes, because hate making out with somebody is definitely the equivalent of punching somebody in the face or stabbing them