Katie > Recent Status Updates

i understand that love is more important than money but… crying over your FAVORITE SWAN dying is just not a relatable experience

puns have no place in the bedroom

it’s reading a liiiitle juvenile. if they were “a thing” idk bro

this doesn’t strike me as weird? she’s prob just calling it the current name for your benefit so you can google it later

i have not been writing enough intermittent updates to tell yall how crazy and bad this man is. just trust me bro

idk why i thought she just bit his dick off

i’m sorry but DONT VAMPIRES NOT SHOW UP IN PHOTOS

jesus

bro what the fuck

$102K for a HOUSE??????????? this must be a fantasy novel

why is this surprising at ALL that a girl would clean her room real quick before getting in trouble THAT MAKES WAY MORE SENE

crazy omg i feel like this probably IS illegal right now

he’s gotta be bluffing

ICK

I HATEHIM

if a man called me angel face id projectile vomit

moral majority mentioned

oh my god they’re talking about glenn youngkin already. i am SAT

“impaled”

christ lmao starting off with a bang

lowkey this is extremely upsetting and not what i expected. i feel less like im learning and more like im putting myself through trauma to reach conclusions i am already fully aware of…

guys this is tea i’m enjoying it a lot

really enjoying this! unfortunately i had NO hustle and it went back to the library. will be back in a few weeks

this communication is mad sexy

THIS TROPE!! I’M KICKING MY FEET

oh shit is about to go crazy huh

150k?????? for the president of fake bloomingdale’s??? are we sure????????????

hahahahahahahah

is this what i think it is

your tire is broken and you should not be driving on it. however, instead of calling a tow and driving you home in my car, *i* will drive *your* broken car while you ride shotgun because i am a man and as such i am uniquely capable of wrangling this beast (car)