Sofie > Recent Status Updates

one of the markers of a good shojo is if i care at all about the secondary couple and tbh i wouldn’t be mad at an entire volume about ten and takao….i would love to know more about their backstories

what a beautifully drawn and written bow for this arc. there is an undeniable level of trust between vanitas and noé that was not there before, and noé has uncovered one of the key pieces of vanitas' story. not through seeing his memories via blood but through what vanitas himself was willing to reveal and then noé making his own connections from there. they've climbed from shadow to light, and they did it together

what if our love was so strong that it shook the very foundations of a man's faith and also what if we were both boys

(cont.)
it reminds me of when he burst into laughter after the first encounter with luca and jeanne, but noé didn't understand him back then, nor was he involved in the crazy plan (any more than just being a pawn) that made vanitas feel so exhilarated in the first place. but now they're aligned in their experiences and feelings and can share in the comedown together. why ARE they alive? it's a joint question now

vanitas saying "i have no idea WHY we're still alive" instead of the more intuitive "how" is interesting. noé did just ask him a different "why" before they jumped into the shadow, and it's clear that being confronted with his past has brought those existential thoughts to the forefront even more so than usual. so for him to call out the utter absurdity of it all and LAUGH ABOUT IT so genuinely?????? (cont.)

and that panel of the book as vanitas is struggling to find the answer??? that book IS the answer in a lot of ways, especially to the "what" of it all. it's his burden but also his purpose, his salvation and his downfall. so for his victorious moment to first be shown through him grabbing hold of the chain is SO satisfying. he is NOT letting the shadows of his past consume him. he holds the chain, he is in control

(cont.)
and that last bit could easily extend to vanitas' life in general, not just this specific mission. why are you still holding on anyway? why are you still fighting when you're on borrowed time and you've suffered through all of it? show me that fight, that stubbornness, that desperation, that complicated vengeance, that contradictory desire for understanding and connection. what are you? why do you persist?

"what are you?" "why are you here, even though you had to go through so much pain to get here?"
the repetition of "what are you" from their very first meeting and now, noé actually has a better idea of the answer and is using it to give vanitas the motivation he needs
and very directly acknowledging the pain???? "i see how hard you're fighting, how much this quest means to you, how good it is (and you are)" (cont.)

continuing with the metaphor, i do not think it's a fucking coincidence that in order to cure this cursebearer, noé and vanitas have to dive straight into the shadow and find the suffering vampire within. AND it's a solution that they could've only thought of and executed as a duo. the first time they are really, truly working together involves diving into darkness and pulling someone out of it. the layers...........

this spread is so fantastic i can't get over how much noé looks like a hero, an angel, a savior. and vanitas is looking up at him like he's all of those things

(cont.)
he has the answer, he said it already, but he just doesn't have enough hope in his abilities to even attempt a solution that is more hands-on and risky and unorthodox. but noé fucking does!!!!!!! he IS vanitas' hope, there's a reason why they officially became partners under the light of a sunrise okay the imagery is SO clear

this moment. in the context of the previously mentioned metaphor. the layers......
vanitas is ready to give up and bear the weight of losing one person in order to save the majority (and it's a weight that clearly would be felt, he doesn't make the decision lightly) bc his own self-hatred and feelings of inadequacy (HIS SHADOW) are blinding him to other potential solutions (cont.)

we've already seen the origin story for and lasting effects of noé's survivor's guilt but now we're seeing that vanitas shares that same feeling. they're both desperate to understand Why. why are they still alive instead of others? what are they doing with that life? what is salvation? do they deserve it? will saving and understanding people be enough to make up for the ones they failed to save and understand?

(cont.)
and in present time, vanitas is very much being haunted by his shadowy past and it's threatening to consume him and doom the people around him if he can't get a hold of himself. coincidence???????? i think NOT. vanitas, in a way, is the cursebearer with the shadow malnomen, and he is constantly fighting against being consumed, especially in both of the moments that are being spliced together here

(cont.)
the explanation for the malnomen is that the vampire's shadow takes on a mind of its own and eventually completely consumes the vampire, engulfing other innocent living beings on the way. and then we see this panel of vanitas with his pronounced under-eye bags, refusing to be take part in the lesson, the sunlight dappling through the leaves and casting these mottled shadows on his face (cont.)

that top right panel is SO fascinating to me. it's clearly showing that despite vanitas sitting away from mikhail and luna and not verbally engaging with the lesson, he is still absorbing the info. BUT i think there might be some extra significance to this particular malnomen and why mochizuki chose this form for these moments, both in the past and in the present (cont.)

it's such clever and thoughtful storytelling to let us splice this explanation with vanitas' memory of luna teaching him and mikhail. since we're diving headfirst into vanitas' past trauma in this arc and vanitas himself is half caught in that past, we don't just see vanitas reciting this information, we are flashed back to his memory of learning it, unlike in other scenarios when he's explained malnomens

and it hits just as hard as it did in the anime!!!! ending the volume with this incredibly grounded chapter about jealousy and self doubt and thinly veiled bullying and teenage existential loneliness and the beauty of connection despite all odds is such a great way to land this very strange plane. this is the point of it all, and somehow, it is incredibly effective

okay so unless there's other stuff in volume 2 that incriminates otogiri, i actually think it's very clear that he's not a creep at all and i cannot imagine why anyone would have a problem with this storyline of hirose having a one-sided crush on him. otogiri should probably tell hirose to stop touching him but that's literally it

i will be interested to see how otogiri handles the crush though bc i was side-eyeing him constantly in the anime and i can only imagine i will be doing the same here. i know he's trying to be the Cool Teacher but lines must be drawn somewhere my guy

i wouldn't be surprised if people were unhappy about hirose's crush on otogiri being more prominent in the manga (although it was DEFINITELY still there in the anime, just toned down) but i actually really like it. it's another element that stands out as uncomfortably realistic alongside all of the absurdity. and it's character building for hirose too!! many a gay awakening has started with a fondness for a teacher

i’m not done talking about this actually bc it’s brilliant. it’s not mean spirited or framed as a cheap excuse to laugh at the weird gross fujoshi, bc we’re also invited to laugh at nakamura for being so boldly creepy and unhinged in his request. and he CLEARLY does not realize that she likes him so there’s no sense that he’s taking advantage of her. they’re both oblivious and lost in their fantasies

and this perfectly illustrates why this manga is the absolute best at handling a fujoshi plotline. nakamura is just as ridiculous and hopeless and doesn’t know how to properly express or deal with his emotions. he’s weird for asking her to draw it, and she’s weird for doing it!! everyone’s a fucking weirdo about love and desire, especially in high school!!!!

whenever any bl includes a fujoshi plotline i brace for the worst but i think the tone of this manga as a whole is very well suited to framing this critique in good natured absurdity. kawamura drawing her friends’ fantasies of their classmates acting out classic bl tropes but not realizing that nakamura is a real life gay person (AND THAT HE ONLY TALKED TO HER BC HE WANTED HER DRAWING OF HIROSE) is hilarious

(cont.)

they’re both stubborn and quick to act and steadfast in their beliefs, and so they both shine as individual characters instead of one totally drowning the other. and when they do manage to work together???? they’re unstoppable

this is a great example of why noé is such a fantastic main character bc a lesser author would have him get swallowed up by the force that is vanitas, but mochizuki refuses to let him sit idly by or be passive if it goes against his motivations or morals. noé pushes back CONSTANTLY and that’s exactly what makes him the perfect foil to vanitas. (cont.)

this repeated/mirrored joke of “stop making that face” is hilarious first of all but also!!!!!! noé is in a constant state of wanting to understand vanitas, which frustrates vanitas, while vanitas is in a constant state of resisting that understanding and putting on an apathetic act to hide his pain, which frustrates noé. even the stupidest of gags in this story are rich with character it’s truly remarkable

(cont.)

both are maladaptive coping mechanisms, both can only grow through coming to truly understand (and love) the other

and this is the big difference between noé and vanitas and why their developing relationship and journey to understanding one another MUST be the crux of this entire series. noé sees the good in everyone, human or vampire or dham, until proven otherwise. meanwhile, vanitas sees the worst in everyone until proven otherwise (and sometimes even then) (cont.)

LOVE the difference in their poses here. noé is leaning slightly forward like he wants to step even closer to vanitas, which aligns with how he’s pressing for more info to try to understand him better. while vanitas is perfectly straight-backed and still, his mouth a thin line. calculated aloofness, just like his words as he speaks about hating humans and vampire equally