Desiree > Recent Status Updates

He looks at me as if he has nowhere else to be. Like there’s not a single thing he wants to miss.
“You look at people intensely.”
“You’re not people.”
I forget how to breathe.  His words are unfair.  They’re too much. They are exactly enough. 

AAAHHHHHH!!! I’M LOVING THIS!!!

"What did you do to him?"
"Applied some judicious pressure to his testicles. Don't get jealous."
"You should be applying pressure to my testicles," Astaroth muttered.

🤭🤣

"You're an arrogant, volatile prick, and you drive me insane."
"Same.”
"You're a conceited know-it-all."
"Takes one to know one.”
"Your cane sword is tacky, and you have horrible taste in hats.”
"Take that back."
"Make me.”
"Why would I do that when you can just take what you want?"

"Get your hands off her?
"Astaroth, it's fine."
"Is it, though?“
"Easy, mate. Don't you think that's a bit possessive for someone not dating her? You aren't dating, right? Just two sworn enemies on a quest, she said."
"And she's my sworn enemy, not yours.”

“If I was six hundred years old or whatever, Id probably have a massive body count, too. I guess you get good at it after that long."
"Oh, I was good at it from the start. Why, looking for tips?"
He'd gladly give her some. Or literally the tip, should she express interest.

A familiar female voice danced over a rhythmic guitar line. Astaroth nodded along. He didn't realize he was quietly singing until Calladia gasped.
"Wait. No way."
"I don't know how I know the song. It's just familiar. Maybe there's an amnesia exception for music?"
"Not that. You're a Swiftie?"
"Is that a species? We've already established I'm a demon."

"You'd be fearsome on a battlefield, too. Eviscerating enemies right and left with that sharp tongue."
"I'm going to eviscerate you with more than my tongue if you don't shut up and let me drive."
"Very well. My vow of silence begins now."
"How long will it last?"
"At least... two minutes."
"Don't make me gag you."
"Kinky. Will you tie me up, too?"
🤣🤣

"You think you’re the victim. You, who tried to take Mariel's soul. Who threatened Oz with a sword. Who tried to ruin their lives to win a bet."
"I have a sword?
"That's what you care about?"
"What kind of sword?"
"Hopeless. You are absolutely hopeless."
"Any idea where it is?"
"Up your ass.”
"How unsafe."

I’m loving them 🤣🤣

“Why had his past self chosen to make an enemy of her rather than seizing the opportunity to use those thighs as earmuffs?” 🤣

“I want it all with you, Leia. Every high, every low. I didn’t believe in destiny until you walked into my life. If it exists, then it’s you. You’re my destiny.”

“What the hell are you doing here?”
“I asked you nicely not to go on this date. Since you wanted to go so badly, then we’ll go.”
Every time I’m alone with him, he shows me a different facet of himself. This part of him might well be my favorite, though I’d never admit it to him.
“You’re insufferable.”
“You’re beautiful.!!!

I watch him as he walks around his desk and pulls out disinfectant wipes. “Come here. Now, Leia.”
I do as he says, and he grabs my hand tenderly as he wipes every inch of my skin.
“What… what are you doing?”
“Getting rid of every trace of him.”

🫪🫪🫪

“When it comes down to it, all I want is happiness. Perhaps it’s cliché to want a husband who’s obsessed with me and kids to raise…Never mind. Who would you be if you could be anyone? Who do you want to be tonight, Thor?”

“Tonight I just want to be the man that gets to love you. Tell me, Ley. How many kids do we have? How long have we been married? How did we meet?”

and they just met 😭😭

And when I snagged his lip again, he groaned and held on to me tighter, breaking apart just long enough to growl, "Gentle, sweetheart," before he kissed me again. 😩😩