Allegedly > Recent Status Updates

"every fiber of him wanted to run right back up those stairs and into ilya's arms. to wrap himself around him and go to bed with him and wake up with him."

I can hear the soundtrack in my head while I'm reading 🥲🥲

yes I really fucking am reading this book AGAIN. omg I haven't been able to read anything else but apparently my attention span has no problem when it comes to focusing on heated rivalry. It makes no sense!! I am Sisyphus!!!

Everything Hurts And I Want To Die

god, how do I explain to people who are excited about season 2 that they should actually just prepare to ugly cry the entire time? like if you thought the yearning was unbearable in Heated Rivalry, then The Long Game will have you setting new standards for what you consider diabolical levels of yearning. fuck.

two chapters in and I'm already feeling devastated about what's to come 😭😭😭

cantstopthinkingaboutheatedrivalrycantstopthinkingaboutheatedrivalrycantstopthinkingaboutheatedrivalrycantstopthinkingaboutheatedrivalrycantstopthinkingaboutheatedrivalrycantstopthinkingaboutheatedrivalrycantstopthinkingaboutheatedrivalrycantstopthinkingaboutheatedrivalrycantstopthinkingaboutheatedrivalrycantstopthinkingaboutheatedrivalrycantstopthinkingaboutheatedrivalrycantstopthinkingaboutheatedrivalrycantstopthin

"He had the most ridiculous urge to send Ilya a text that just said I love you. He had those words trapped inside of him, filling every part of him, and, the strain of keeping them from slipping out was getting harder to endure." Shane bb we love u 🫶

Reread udate: I continue to not be ok as I wait for episode 5 and feel like I'm grieving because of the way episode 4 ended. THIS MAKES NO SENSE, I KNOW WHAT HAPPENS.

I am absolutely sick over episode 4 of heated rivalry will you all play give me your recs for forbidden love/angst/yearning to tide me over 😭 I need to be freed from the shackles of my own mind!!!

I keep closing my eyes but I can't block you out / Want to fly to a place where it's just you and me / Nobody else, so we can be free

"I WANT YOUR THINGS IN MY ROOM, I MISS YOU ALL OF THE TIME"

i made a Shane and Ilya yearning playlist. A FUCKING PLAYLIST.

My wicked tongue / Where will it be / I know if I'm onto you, you must be onto me

Microdosing the book to stave off the withdrawals between episodes

I'm WEAK for hollanov, fuck. I was trying to wait until after watching all of the show before doing a reread ... AND YET HERE I AM.

time for a reread to decompress after I just finished a 19-book series about sex trafficking lmao

my entire fyp is heated rivalry edits HELP (actually, don't)

**Laura Palmer's theme song plays**

why am I doing this to myself

alrighty, time to get controversial 🤪

so... am I supposed to want to cry after that or ? just me?

I love that Jessie Walker wrote and shared with us a book she was scared for her audience to read because she knew she took it to another level. To think that we could have a watered down version of this book is devastating. This book is a gift.

help, how do I savor this book while also devouring it 😫😫

fucking addicted, as if there was ever a doubt

you ever read a book that actually want to slow down to savor it more thoroughly? 🤌🤌 Thea's storytelling is so incredible ugh

hehehe kicking my feet and smiling 🥰

one chapter in and I feel like I'm in the book 😻