Chase > Recent Status Updates

Respect to the author for writing a super long passage that’s just discussing whether or not Star Wars sucks but I could’ve done without

“I tied the ability to care about others to a rock in my internal lake years ago” you know what? I think this may be a DNF, I’ll give it until the end of what’s meant to be an assassination to make that choice

I’ve heard a lot of good things about this book, but admittedly I’m rapidly growing skeptical when the start of it reads like a Sara J Maas title and includes the phrase “still my stabby hand”

This book is starling house + forty times the mommy issues and a better written mystery

Oh ew Elloren named an adopted son after her dead husband??????????? That’s fucked I’m so sorry

Oh my god “his desire stiff as steel” is that supposed to be a good euphemism??????????

Ok this epilogue is really uncomfortable. It starts by being introduced to a gardnerian child who was orphaned during the war, taken in by the lupines, and seeing him grow up and let go of hate…………………. And then how he got all freaky fucky with a grown up Fern who we’ve spent five books reading as a child. That’s so gross. Just say they’re in a relationship, why get SO EXTREMELY graphic??

Lmao there’s literally 50 minutes left in this book and NOW we get “epilogue.” Could’ve cut…… I’d say at least 18 hours out of this book and lost nothing.

Oh we’re going full Poison Ivy but limp dick milquetoast variety. I hate it.

Oh Jules is here. I hoped he was dead.

Does Laurie Forest not know what the word restoration means? Does she know what any word means? Her favorite special word is frison and no one likes that word, so does she know what non-special snowflake words mean?

“They’re working to re-wild nature” so…….. planned?

Oh cute Elloren and Yvan’s baby is called Tesla…….. so Laurie Forest is like DEFINITELY Mormon, right?

This book isn’t 800 pages long, it’s just shy of that, and it’s not a 32 hour long audio book, it’s like 31 and a half. So why? Why is there so much unneeded content? Why is there random epilogues for EXTREMELY irrelevant characters in a BLOATED cast? Who asked for this? Surely not an editor, that would mean an editor was hired, so it’s got to be an attempt to hit a word count.

“[wrenfere] and hazel had so little time together-“ yeah like what, 4 sentences? 2 of which it’s just the implication that you think the other is hot?

Fun fact! The red grip is the only god damn disease in this series. Is there probably more? Maybe! This is the only one we talk about at all literally ever

You know what I’m not even going to take the time to skip through and check in through this chapter, I so thoroughly could not possibly give a shit about Iris that I’m just skipping her whole epilogue, it should be the length of a paragraph, not an entire chapter shut the fuck up and END THIS MISERY

Oh of course we get a stupid fucking pov from Iris and of COURSE she’s in love with a character that we’ve BARELY seen outside of the background who was also a DICK and they’ve never spoken to one another as far as I can remember. Jesus fucking Christ WHY. WHO WANTS THIS. LAURIE WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU

Actually the biggest dumbest part of this (maybe, god there’s so much badly written and stupid in this book) is the mythical great tree being called Three, and it dying, so it being reborn. What’s the new tree’s name? Four. Just call it Tobias instead, that would at least be a solid joke

Final part chapter 3: listening to Tierney and Orm’yr talk about how she’s too much of a prude to say sex and how now they’re married
Instant skip
Chapter 4: that, again, but with seriously wildly, uselessly minor characters doing the same thing
Fucking SKIPPPPPP

I have never - NEVER - read a book with a multiple love interests problem where they confirm that the fulcrum of the conflict (Tierney in this case) is poly and then just go “meh she’s going to choose just one anyway, she gets to pick another one later because they’re both immortal. And what about option 3? Literally do not worry about it he’s fine”

There’s like one or two moments in this liiiiingering conclusion that are worth reading, seeing Damien Bane get some pitiful comeuppance is one of them and I was looking forward to more but instead it’s just resolving everyone’s deeply forbidden loves now that racism is eradicated. And Aislinn wasn’t even the one to rip apart Damien.

Lmao racist person doesn’t racist one time and literally passes out instantly

This books a master class in how to ruin any kind of real tension. We’ve beaten the big bad. We’ve had the big reveal. We’ve had the heroic speech. Now is when we do a time jump, we hear the epilogue, the wrap up of how everyone’s story goes, we skip to when the baby is born. Instead there’s 4 hours left and we’re still dealing with the intimate details of people being dumb. It ruins all the catharsis

Awwww everyone gets to go to forced tree therapy how sweet

“I finally understand that everyone is capable of being good or evil and we have to choose to be good” so what’s the moral of the story, Laurie? I don’t think I got it through the brick you just smacked into my face

“The 7 need to make contact with the wand” oh sick so ellorans going to dildo herself with the wand of prophecy and everyone else will get a finger on whatever’s sticking out?

Lmao “you need 7 light mages” “I’m pregnant!” “Oh sick that’ll do”

“These shadow moons couldn’t just take out Yvan, but also our unborn child” ITS A BARELY FERTILIZED CLUMP OF EGGS YOU COULD SNEEZE AND THAT THING WOULD COME OUT

“There’s fae killing iron in these orbs - but not just normal iron, shadow iron, void iron” evil iron, fantasy iron, the bad kind of iron